This is not related to my own child, but the child of one of my friends and neighbours.
The boy in question is 8 years old, lives on our road, and is in my sons class in school.
I was talking to his mum last night.
Basically, the way I understand it, he has developed a strange anxiety. Last year, his father lost consciousness and fell over in their living room, and was taken to hospital in an ambulance together with the boys mum. The boy was left sleeping in his bed, and his older sister was home with him. His parents were still not home when he woke up next morning. His grandma was taken ill a little later, and needed an operation in hospital. His cat died. The neighbour, a 20 year old girl was found dead in her bead after an epileptic fit in her sleep.
Another neighbour, a 12 year boy had a few years earlier tried to make a silly joke on his family, and put a noose around his neck, and walked down the stairs, so it should look like he had hung himself from the banister. He slipped and fell, and strangulated himself, but did not at the time die, he became severly brain damaged. The kids on the street are still talking about this.
Our neighbour flew to Mallorca with his family this summer, and there was really bad turbulence in the airplane, and he got very scared of dying.
Since then he has developed a strange kind of anxiety, everytime he is alone he is scared of either himself dying, or his family dying, and he is scared he is going to do something that either causes him or somebody else death. He is also thinking about suicide. Some days he wishes his parents, or grandparents were dead, and he imagines life without them.
He has a referral to some sort of child psychiatric assessment, but the waiting list is long.
Meanwhile, my son has been walking to and from school with him. His mum does not want him to walk on his own, so she has spoken to the after school club about her son staying on to wait for my son, so they can leave together. My son is supposed to leave at 3.30. He is supposed to leave at 3 pm. Only, the school has said he can wait alone in the carpark for 30 minutes, until my son finnishes. I think it is irresponsible of the school to let him stay alone in the carpark for 3o minutes until my son leaves, under the circumstances. Bearing in mind that this is a boy that has strange thoughts about his or others peoples death when left on his own.
One issue I have with this is that I dont know what frame of mind the boy is going to be in after 30 minutes alone, and if it is fair to expect my son to deal with him on the 15 minute walk home. Across a bridge with a fast river, along a relatively busy road. Is there a chance that the boy will throw himself into the river if compulsion takes him? Or throw himself in front of a car? The boy is much taller than my son, and very strong. Is there a chance he will feel compelled to throw my son into the river? Or in front of a car?
Where we live it is normal for children to walk to and from school on their own from they are 6 years old. So please dont flame me for letting my son walk to and from school, it is besides the point. However, I am of course not happy for my son to walk with this boy, at this point in time. Yet at the same time I am not keen to wash my hands off the problem and leave him to walk on his own. Ideally, his mum should be picking him up, she is a sahm, and there is no reason why she couldnt come and walk home with him, or pick him up by car.
I am however wondering if she is using my son as company for her boy, rather than picking him up herself.
I have never heard of anything else like this, and dont really know what to think about it. I dont know if there is any risk in them walking home together, or him walking on his own. Though, his mum would not let him walk alone home from football practice (5 minutes walk away) the other week, and came to pick him up, so she must hace some concerns.
Any ideas, or any experience?