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Parenting

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Original poster

Sleepover party

8 replies

cardy · 08/09/2010 21:09

DD (9) has been invited to a birthday party which is a sleepover in the garden (tent) with 8 other girls.

I really don't want her to go - I'm not a fan of sleepovers anyway and I think 9 is too young but also I am not that sure of the girl's parents....don't know them very well, and think a rainy night (this weekend) in a tent is just not what I want her to be doing. I am not sure if I'm being unreasonable (DH agrees with me but is prepared to let her go so as not to disappoint her).

She will be really disappointed but is that a good enough reason to let her go?

I think of a reason to say no ther than I don't thimnk she's old enough. Don't know what to tell the girl's parents.

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Original poster

cardy · 09/09/2010 10:08

Should read "I can't think of a reason"
Any advice gratefully received!

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Original poster

cardy · 09/09/2010 10:54

bump

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bigTillyMint · 09/09/2010 10:56

It's really tricky, isn't it? Sleepovers are the devils work!

I would want to know whether the parents would be out there too, and if not, how they will supervise them. If the supervision is not adequate in your eyes, then that is a solid reason.

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PositiveAttitude · 09/09/2010 13:44

Hmmmmm!! I think that 9 is ok for a sleepover with just one friend. I would certainly have reservations about there being 8 other girls. There will be no sleeping!!! You will have one really grumpy daughter the next day and for a few days after!!

Why in a tent? Is it so that the parents can just shut the door and let them all get on with it, if so, definitely "NO"!! If its because they cannot do it in the house and the mum will sleep in there with them, then maybe not so bad.

As a compromise, perhaps if you say no to this sleepover party you could arrange to have the girl to stay with you and have a special "girlie" evening with your DD, but you will then be in control and only 2 girls, not loads.

Your DD will probably be disappointed if you say no, but she may not be too sure about it all herself and may even be relieved that she doesnt have to worry about it.

Hope you can all be happy with your decision.

Ragwort · 09/09/2010 13:48

Sounds like great fun for a 9 year old - I would certainly encourage my 9 year old to go along - does it make any difference that I have a boy? I think if your DD really wants to go you should let her - I am sure if it is really wet the girls will all end up inside anyway.

NikkiH · 09/09/2010 16:17

Could you plan to do something else instead with your DD that's equally fun and use that as an excuse to parents and DD as to why she can't go?

Original poster

cardy · 09/09/2010 16:28

Thanks for the advice. I'll try and think of an alternative treat or her.

I don't mind sleepovers if it is just one or two and I know the parents better but 9 of them in the garden .

I don't really get this all this 'lets have loads of girls sleeping over'. I wasn't allowed to have sleepover until at least year 7!

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Rosebud05 · 09/09/2010 21:55

I wouldn't guarantee they'll be in the garden all night - the nights are pretty chilly now.

Hope that the parents have a 'B' plan for when they're all cold from sitting around in their pyjamas and can't sleep.

My kids are much younger, but if I knew the parents a bit and some of the other kids going, I think I'd let her as long as there was going to be an adult sleeping in the tent and I'd sort of be expecting to be called to pick her up at some point.

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