4 year old calling people fat...help!

[moonminmama]

My ds is 4 on Tuesday. He has suddenly started noticing 'fat people' my brother is a big lad and my mum is 'cuddly' but my ds has suddenly started saying that thy are fat. for example earlier today he was pretending to be a police man and told my mum she wasn't allowed in the kitchen 'no fat ladies allowed' he said. There was no malice in it, but it is obviously not very nice and it upset my mum (as it would me!)

I honestly don't know where it has come from. We don't use the word fat at home. I have told him it's a naughty word and that it makes people sad when he says it but he still does it. Does any one have any experience with this?

Bump

He's just telling it how he sees it.

Tell him that it isnt kind to make comments about how a person looks, and then distract him. "ooh, look at that aeroplane" etc.

My ds is 2 and in supermarket last week a nice man smiled at him, and as he walked off ds said loudly "bye bye fat old man" and smiled sweetly at me. He has also recently named one of his teddies (handmade by great auntie and a little over-stuffed) "fat ted". All coincides with a new found love of Thomas the tank engine...could the fat controller be to blame for your problems too?

As MNTotoro says, he is just saying as he sees it.

Does he go to playgroup? Could have picked it up there maybe.

We had a similar thing with my DD at the same age. My DH is on the large size, and my DD was walking past him in the supermarket and said in a very very loud voice "scuse me daddy your fat belly is in the way"

There were a few sniggers, as it was said with absolutely no malice at all, but we did have a little discussion about how sometimes we don't always say things like fat as it makes some people very sad.

Its all part of the learning and socialising process imo :)

Thanks. My ds doesn't mean it in it in a nasty way at all. lyds3 he doesn't really watch ttte so I can't really blame that tbh. I think it as others have said, he is just saying what he sees.

I will just have to keep telling him that it makes people feel bad when he says it.

Thanks all x

I think most children go through phases of saying things they have heard others say. My dd is fascinated with pregnant women at the moment. (she is 3.5)

We took my 60 year old aunt out for lunch this week and in the car dd pointed to her tummy (which is rather large) and asked if she had a baby in there! Luckily my aunt was amused and knew it was said in complete innocence.

Another time when out in town a male dwarf (I hope that is the right word) was walking in front of us and dd shouted out "Mummy I think that little boy has lost his mummy", again complete innocence.

I think as they get older it will become easier for them to understand what is and isn't acceptable to say but for now I just ask her not to shout so loudly (why is it she always say's inappropriate things in such a loud voice) and that it is not polite to comment on peoples size or colour.