I used to think I was a good parent...

[Mishy1234]

...or at least an adequate one.

Now I'm sure I'm an awful one:-(

DS1 is 2.5 and DS2 is 11 weeks. Nobody is EVER happy and no matter how hard I try I never seem to get anything right. DS2 bf constantly (I know this is normal) whilst DS1 tears the house apart around me. I can't get anything done and even the normal stuff like feeding DS1 is accompanied by DS2 screaming (I have tried a sling, he hates it if he's awake). I HATE leaving my baby to cry, but it's the only way I can do anything at all.

Going out is absolute torture and if they fall asleep I just park somewhere and sit in the car, when I should really be at home getting stuff done. God knows how I'm going to cope when all DS1's activities start up again next week.

The worst thing is that I do have support. DS1 is in nursery 2 days and goes to his GP's 1 day, so I really only have 2 whole days with the two of them. How crap am I?

My house is a tip all the time, so I can never invite anyone over. I'm even ashamed of the postman seeing the livingroom through the window!

Very, very self indulgent post I know. Feel a bit better now.

swallowedAfly- you're very sweet, thanks for the sympathy.

I'm trying to keep DS1 as amused as I can (baking, reading, park etc), but it's just never enough. No sooner than we've done one thing he's moaning for something else. I have to give DS2 some attention! He's a very huggy child, so is always sitting on me or trying to if DS2 is feeding (remarkably irritating unfortunately). He's also always poking at DS1 which doesn't help!

My parents aren't nearby, but I do have very good PIL. There's a limit to what you can ask though and they already do far more for me than I'm really comfortable with.

I guess I think I should be able to cope. It's only 2 days afterall, but it's far, far harder than I expected. DS1 just seems to have stepped up his neediness and I do feel that he deserves my time. But so does DS2. Just don't seem to be able to get it right atm.

(DH very supportive, but just started a new job so not really as available as we'd like).

To paraphrase Churchill I would say that 11 weeks into toddler and newborn-ness you are, at least, at the end of the beginning.

Chin up, it's not just you honestly.. everyone struggles whether they admit it or not. Cbeebies, forget the housework past the bare minimum, head down and in a few more weeks, months you'll realise you're through the worst.