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Help me turn us around!

3 replies

invisibleink · 18/08/2010 21:28

I have three DC's under 5. Lately we seem to have gotten in a bit of a negative rut and I seem to be losing my cool a lot easier and I seem to be always picking at things. Stop this, stop that etc. I do try and praise but the middle one doest actually seem to like it, and the older one, if I praise the middle one has to jump in with what about me, I can do that/am that etc too arent I? (even when he hasnt/isnt) The older one also like to 'tell tales' on the middle one to get him in trouble which is very wearing when it happens every five minutes. The middle one has also started to tantrum massivley and nothing I do can seem to turn it around. He just loses the plot for ages and is really stubborn.

I have tried 1 2 3 magic, but they dont seem to care. I have tried taking away toys, but they share most of them so it is really punishing both of them which isnt fair. They really dont have anything that is their own as they are so close in age iyswim?

I make sure I get down and talk to them at their level, do the low tone voice thing but it doesnt seem to make a difference.

I play with them loads but have to get housework done as well and they striggle with that. I do set them up with something, play with them and then retreat but they are constantly after me. Then I get annoyed because I cant get ANYTHING done.

By the time evening rolls around I am exhausted!

Any tips or turning this around and getting a bit more positive atmosphere going? I want my smiley boys back!

Also, how do I get them to listen? I dont want to have to threaten (toys, 123 ) to get them to do stuff? HTT seems ok, and I use the describe technique quite a bit but it seems to be losing its effect!!

(this follows on from my thread the other day, but I am feeling better - a bit! :) I am going to try the one on one time as suggested but have been busy with relatives since then but will try it as soon as I can. )

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
MrsPurple · 18/08/2010 22:16

how about reverse psychology? Say you don'tn think they can do something.

Also the cloud reward chart so it seperates each child.

madmothership · 19/08/2010 00:10

I didn't see your earlier thread, but the trying to get something done and they're after you - well, I have that too. I find that if I ask them to help me, it can work. Even if you just give one a sheet of kitchen roll and ask them to wipe the front of the fridge, and get the other one to drag a mop across the floor (no water or cleaning substance necessary). You will find they are happy doing it, you're creating a group activity and you might be able to put a sandwich together or the laundry through at the same time. Hang in there.

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