Hit them back?

[ArseyMum]

Hypothetical question, what do you do about childhood tiffs, young children, under 8 say? If another child pushes/shoves/hits etc what do you tell your child to do? I don't want to be the sort of mother who rushes to intervene if my child is on the receiving end of behaviour like this, although I would if they were dishing it out. I want them to learn to stand up for themselves.

Another mother I know said she has told her child to hold up her hand and say "no, I don't like that" very firmly, which I thought sounded really good. What do others do? What works well?

I think that the other mother's approach is good, plus then teach your child to walk away calmly.

No way do I tell them to hit back! I like your friend's approach.

i do the same as your friend.
ds1 has been taught to say pretty much the same thing "NO! that isn't very nice" and then to walk away

i don't think you can teach a child that hitting is wrong by encouraging them to hit back

I tell mine to tell a responsible adult, and tell me or dh when they get home

we do not solve our difficulties with violence in our family, end of story

I loathe parents who tell their children to hit back tbh

Does that approach work well?

I dislike the hitting back theory. If they do it at school they'll get into trouble as well.
I have taught my son to say 'stop it, that's naughty' and then tell someone.

Mine know that it is not the 'right' thing to hit back, but that if they have tried other interventions that have failed I would not be cross with them if they told me they'd done so

They are both gobshites, though, so are able to manage the "STOP THAT NOW I DON'T LIKE IT!"

Or

"I'M TELLING ON YOU!" with ease (for now, anyway)