Finding 10yr old DD difficult to handle

[hangingfromtherafters]

My 10yr old DD is a nightmare - moody all the time, unresponsive, rude to me, her dad, other adults, bullies her two younger siblings. It doesn't help that she looks far older than her age and has already started her period. My husband and I are almost at the end of our tether, worrying if we've failed somewhere as parents. We've tried the naughty step, confiscating her tv/stereo/etc, grounding, but nothing seems to work. I even try and have one to one time which will work for the day but then she's back to her sullen self. Has anyone got any ideas, I'm desperate :-(

Think you've actually answered this yourself - you say that one to one works for the day - so there you go - kid is craving attention spend time with her tell her you love her stop the punishments !! just spend time together !!!! x

in reality its hard to have one to one time every day! Watching this thread as dd1 (also oldest of 3) is the same. . .

one to one can be cooking dinner together - shopping etc etc dosn;t have to be both sitting down playing scrabble it;s obvious she;s unhappy and wanting to be noticed hence the bad behaviour kids will do anything to get attention from parents even if it's negative - just turn the tables round big up the good things she does ignore the bad tell her stories of adorable things she did when she was little etc,just give lots of love, im positive this will help x

Ah poor little love. She has got herself a grown up body with baby emotions and reactions.

Give her as much attention as if she was a tiny 5 year old -she is still feeling like that inside.

Its such a trial being big/mature/grown up for your age. All of the expectations with none of the benefits.

aw thanks for the positive comments. We're actually looking at her baby photos today which seems to be doing the trick - for the moment anyway. Problem is I have to work pretty much every day of the summer hols, have a feeling the days ahead are going to be a challenge.

Nothing to add, but watching this carefully - we have a DD of 10 who is also becoming a teenager far too early!

Interesting that she, like yours, is happy at times to quieten down and remember when she was "little". She is still fascinated by her baby book and things she used to do/read/watch.

The other day she said "What's Balamory?"

Also have nothing to add, but am watching with interest. DD1 is 10 and sounds very similar to the op's.
She can be rude and says nasty things, and then in the next breath can be the sweetest girl!