Pocket money for a 12 year old - how much?

[SamanthaB123]

We have been a bit slack with dishing out pocket money recently and I feel a bit guilty. I want to re-establish a pocket money system for my 12 year old and 9 year old. Ideally the 12 year old would buy her own toiletries, school stationary and books that she would like to read. This is not because we don't want to buy them because in effect we will be, more that I want her to gain some understanding of how much the things that she likes costs. I'm happy for DD2 to do the same and she would probably like to but I don't feel that they should have the same amount of money. Not least she uses much less in the way of toiletries. How much do you think they should each get a week?

My DS, aged 15 gets £50 per month. I deduct £8 for his mobile phone insurance (though I do pay £25 per month phone contract). He will do his bedroom, walk the dog and the occasional tidy up job.

He buys all games, magazines, fast food, cinema,etc but I will top up if he needs (wants?) something extra,like paintballing for a friend's birthday.

I buy most clothes and all uniform, school dinners. He saves little and doesn't do too much extra for the money. Probably has it too easy!

DS1(12) gets £5 a week, subject to his room being tidy. Luckily we've never had to say no to giving him due to the state of his room; clearly it acts as a good incentive!

DS2(9) doesn't get a weekly pocket money, but even he doesn't see the need in it.

DS1 usually spends it on going out to the cinema with friends or iTunes.

I have to say, neither me nor my wife are particularly strict about it with the whole "You'll have to wait until your next pocket money" regime, if DS1 is invited to the cinema with friends and he's out of money, we would tend to give him the necessary funds. He's not yet learnt to take advantage of this though!

WingDad what happens if you're out with your 9yo and he sees something small value he'd like do you decide whether to buy it for him based on your mood, or do you have a system for deciding when to buy him stuff (or do you never buy him anything). Especially if your 12yo is there and can go ahead & buy it because he does have money in his pocket.

If mine didn't have pocket money they'd nag me constantly to buy them things, so my choices became A) indulge them a lot; B) regular pocket money or C) policy of I never buy them anything (actually it's B+C together).

mine get pocket money if their bedrooms are tidy

They get 50p a week for their age (dd is 11 and gets £5.50, DS1 is 9 so gets £4.50 and DS2 is 6 so gets £3)

this is their sweet, comic or toy money

Personally, I'd say what they need and then add a bit more so they have got the opportunity to learn to save.

My DD, 6 has the opportunity to earn up to £3 a week, but she does have to save £1 a week for things she wants in the longer term. I think they need to get in the mindset that you always save some money for a rainy day from the very beginning.

Hi Ragged,

In the instance you outline, then yes I'd probably buy the small value item for the 9y.o. They're not demanding lads and never ask for much at all really, so when they do ask they usually REALLY would like it; but as I say, they're not spoilt in any way so don't go around asking for anything and everything. I hope you understand what I mean!

Harry (the 9y.o) seems to have decided for himself that Tyler (12y.o) is older so has the responsibility of his own money, and it doesn't bother him!

Although in cases when the two want the same thing in a shop or whatever, then I'd usually tell Tyler that I'd buy it. However these instances are rare. We've never encountered any arguments/jealousy/evils from the way we do this, so I guess it works!

I hope this doesn't make me look like I spoil my kids; because (as I grew up with several spoilt children) I can assure you this doesn't happen!

We have also decided to change the 12 year old's bank account to accomodate the new pocket money. She is going to have a cash point card and we are going to transfer momey weekly to her account. This way she will have to decide that she wants to spend money and go to a cash point to get it first. I am hoping it will help her learn about managing her finances.

Wow! all really helpful stuff.
My DD has just started secondary and is asking for money to go our with her friends at the w/e. Part of me feels that I shouldn't just be a money tree and should make her do some chores to earn her money to spend but she always asks at the last minute and needs the money then!!
This thread has been really helpful, thanks
Will go and discuss with Hubby and come up with a plan!!!

Thanks guys this thread has helped a lot.
Must point out I am actually completely and utterly useless with my own finances
Thankfully this hasn't rubbed off in a negative way as DS1 (aged 14) now hoards any money he has.
DS2 (5) is clueless (I don't take him shopping )
Have therefore decided to follow Manda25, and start transferring money on a weekly/monthly basis to cover lunch money, pocket money, phone top up, clothes etc.
I will still buy him toiletries and school uniform as I class them as essentials. (Phone top up no, because he is on a rolling month contract and if he doesn?t use his bolt ons they roll forward, just depends how many texts he sends etc).

I know this is an old thread but I'm 18 and my parents give me £7 a week, £4 of which goes directly into my bank account every month and £3 I get in coins. They give me £3 every week to get myself a nice lunch at school instead of taking one in with me. They pay for half of my mobile top up, but I only top up £10 every three months or so. They also pay for piano lessons (£6.50 a week) and clothes that I NEED. I don't get EMA :'( but I've not missed a day of school this year anyway :D

My daughter age 12 goes to a private school, she met a girl who gets £40 a week, which is ridiculous! She gets £10 a month, but it can be boosted to £20 if she does a lot of jobs around the house and is helpful.

you lot are tight gets a tenner a month mine get a fiver per week and my house is spotlas u tight gets