Am I being unspeakably cruel to make DD walk 1.6 miles to school?

[OrangeSpacedust]

MIL and a few others think I am. DD starts in September and we've done a trial run on the walk, which takes 30 minutes each way. MIL was horrified, saying "she'll be exhausted by the time she's there and fall asleep in class! And walking all that way will be so boring!" ... or words to that effect.

Personally, I want to get her in the habit NOW of walking every day, not getting driven, and I feel, well, what would we rather be doing than getting exercise and just being together, talking about all the things we see along the way etc etc ... sitting in front of the TV?! DH works pretty flexible hours so in the depths of winter we would be able to drive rather than battle through a horizontal snowstorm.

DD did say herself that the walk was "very long", but I just assumed she'd get quickly get used to it, but am having a wobble though, that it might be too much for a 5-year-old ... AIBU??

Orangespacedust, why don't you start walking 30 minutes every day now, so by the time she gets to school, she is totally used to it?

I agree with others, they are v. tiny at that age and they do get tired, but if she is used to the walk, then that won't be a significant factor in her tiredness. (She'll be tired anyway with the new experience of school, teachers, etc.)

If we can't give our kids the gift of knowing that 30 minutes walk is not a big deal, then frankly we deserve to waste our NHS budgets on obesity-related illnesses.

The whole subject makes me v. cross. Don't let your MIL put you off, you'll be doing your DD a massive favour by teaching her that walking is a normal, default method of transport, not something you do only if someone sponsors you to.

Dd3 has always walked just over a mile to and from school. Sometimes she scoots. She is slow though but we just leave the house early, if it's pouring with rain we leave the car at the shop half way there so we don't get soo wet but still don't get caught up in the school run traffic.
We take a snack for on the way home, If it becomes a normal part of their routine they soon get used to it. It makes them more aware of crossing roads to preparing for when they get more independent.
Go for it more people should do it.

Not in the least cruel, but could you have the option of a bike + seat (or tagalong) for when you're in a hurry?

ooh yes scooter is a brilliant idea. DC's love it and it becomes fun instead of a chore.

Lots of schools now have storage space for scooters as well.

My dds did this for donkeys' years, right from nursery age (in fact, below that because dd2 had to go with dp to walk dd1, even before she started nursery herself). If you make children walk, they soon get used to walking. She will be fine.

HerBeatitude 'If we can't give our kids the gift of knowing that 30 minutes walk is not a big deal, then frankly we deserve to waste our NHS budgets on obesity-related illnesses' - abso-bloody-lutely. Well said!

i don't think a 30 min walk is a big deal, my 5 yr old does it in and out of town fine

BUT, don't underestimate how tired they get when they first start school. no matter how well she walks it now, after a long day at school (physically and mentally) she may be really tired out by home time

so i would def have some kind of back-up, even if that be a little buggy if you have one?

Wow, thanks for all the votes of confidence!

HerBeatitude, good idea about getting into the habit of walking this distance in the run up to school starting (though we do that, and more, fairly often anyway without too much complaint!)

*If we can't give our kids the gift of knowing that 30 minutes walk is not a big deal, then frankly we deserve to waste our NHS budgets on obesity-related illnesses.

The whole subject makes me v. cross. Don't let your MIL put you off, you'll be doing your DD a massive favour by teaching her that walking is a normal, default method of transport,*

You are so, so right - my feelings exactly!

And I will have scooter as a backup, definitely.

Thanks all - feeling much happier now!!

I agree with others that doing the walk twice a day from the outset might be a bit ambitious - my DD was absolutely shattered when she first started all day school. But if you keep the 2x a day walk as a goal that would be a good thing. Aim for 2x a day without fault by spring (you may end up not walking in the winter due to bad weather).

Being unspeakably cruel would be locking your child in a cupboard!

Walking to school should be the norm and not a novelty.

I walk to school almost everyday. It is just over a mile. My ds walks most of the way home, he is 21months. He loves the time we spend looking for spiders etc.
DDs both enjoy the walk. DD1 now rides on her own. DD2 is in reception and rides her scooter.

Since when did walking become such a chore for everybody. Thats why we still have legs.
Tell your MIL to walk with you in the mornings it might give her something else to moan about

Me & DS have been doing this since he was 3 (he's 7 now).

At first it was bloody hard but we kept at it.

Now I think it takes us about 15-20mins and DS will walk anywhere and is probably one of the fittest children in his class.

Totally agree with HerBeatitude comments especially as I see children from DS class being driven a 5 min walk!

LOL Riven it's precisely because of the walk that we can eat doughnuts with a clear conscience.

I agree with the majority and also add that 30 mins of walking twice a day will actually get her brain oxygenated for learning. Many studies have shown that learning is easier when you exercise regularly.

Orange,
When my kids were that small they were shattered after spending the day at school.
I think this is acceptable if its a nice morning and you are both not stressed or in a rush.

I understand some people dont have the option but if you have a choice I would walk as the luxury and go by car as the norm. It has potential to be stressful for you and her.

Why dont you just try it a couple of days a week and see how she copes. Just thinking by the end of the week you may both long for the car!

My 5 yr old walks to school. It's a 20min huff and puff up hills to get there. Takes 15 mins coming back. He used to walk to nursery from the age of 3.

I think it wakes him up in a morning. It doesn't tire him but we go walking on weekends. So it's part of his lifestyle.

Our school encourages walking but our school isn't accessible easily for cars apart from a tiny road leading into it reserved only for staff and deliveries so even those who drive have at least a good 5min walk to the classes.

I enjoy our walks together, I find out loads of stuff of what's happening in his school life whilst we chat. It's a nice walk. All the neighbours wave at us. And it's great exercise for me. I have lost over a stone and I am still eating chocolate biscuits.

My children go to school a mile away, my DD starts school in September but for the past year and a half she has had to walk the mile to nursery, home again at lunchtime and then she has to do it all again when we go for DS. She's never tired quite the opposite she's first awake every morning.
DS is 7 and been there 3 years, when he started reception he was a little tired for the first 3 weeks, don't know if that was down to the walking or getting used to the full days.
I don't have a car to use so we do it in all weathers and it hasn't really been a problem at all.
I have had negative comments especially when DD's buggy broke when she was 2 1/2 and I refused to get another as she spent more time out of it than in, my response is always 'So what is the point in having legs?'.
My parents were always very outdoorsy people and we walked everywhere, I just don't see the issue.

I have been doing a 35 minute walk to school for 8 years now.

DCs complain only if it's raining, even when we were doing 3 times a day with nursery collection. It really does make a difference to everyone's health, I really feel it after the summer holidays!

Another plus is that dcs teachers have often commented that they are ready to settle down to work much faster than others because they've had a run in the fresh air and blown the cobwebs away.

Also, IME, they are less prone to coughs, colds etc than those going from centrally-heated house to heated car to heated classroom. But that may just be my bratlings.

You also have time to hear everyone's school news. As they get older they seem to chat more on the walk than when we're at home. And we play lots of I-Spy, making words out of number plate letters, etc.

Walking is far less stressful than driving. You don't have to pay attention to other pedestrians in case they kill you, you don't have to find a parking space, you don't have other parents swearing at you because you aren't moving your car fast enough ... and instead of concentrating on John Humphries et al, you're talking to your children and finding out stuff you might otherwise miss about their lives.

Also, driving when you don't need to, is anti-social and philistine. It causes congestion and pollution and makes your child's and every other school child's journey more dangerous than it needs to be. It teaches your child to be disempowered and a bit pathetic - oh it's raining, I melt in rain so we'd better drive and get fat. It is also v. unco-operative - schools are desperately trying to reduce traffic outside schools and get parents to ensure that they start their children off ready to pay attention to teachers every day - the best way to do that is to start the day with a walk or cycle, rather than sit fatly in a car.

Can you tell I have a bee in my bonnet about this?

MY mum used to walk 4 miles to school at this age, I don't think it is a big issue at all. They soon build up the right muscles and DD often walk to her drama class (25 mins) and we have a nice chat, and if she has had a bad day the physical excercise of running about really helps her vent, often school is a lot of sitting down, certainly DD is full of beans when I collect her and happily skips down the road chatting.

Riven - 'Walking should be the norm and a car a luxury' - yes, yes indeed!

A friend a few years ago asked dp to bring her daughter home to our house with him and the dds, on the one day a week that she had to work late. Daughter did this walk once and then complained that it was too far for her and mum ended up paying for her to stay at after-school club once a week instead. Bonkers!

Exactly! This is why I think this thread is so important because many parents DON'T do / say that.

Child complains about walking; child is made to walk; eventually child stops complaining. It isn't flipping rocket science!

OMG listen to yourselves, no wonder kids in the UK are getting so unfit. The child is 5yrs old, not 2yrs old.
30 mins walk is nothing, my own children have been on 5hr walks up and down mountains from the age of 3yrs old....yes walking most of the way and using the carrier on the dangerous rocky bits.
The more children walk the stronger they become.
The OP is right.
P.s Most small children around the world walk for hours to and from school and then have to help with chores.