need to talk

[linzoid]

My uncle was diagnosed as having a brain tumour at christmas and has been deteriorating over the months. My nanna (his mum) went in hospital 3 weeks ago and found out she also had cancer. Last week she died ( i think more of a broken heart than the cancer) My mum and all my aunties and uncles (my nanna had 6 children) have all been to the funeral today. We haven't told my uncle with the tumour as he has been unable to communicate this last few days and we didn't want him to have the heartache. My auntie(his wife) lied to him today to go to the funeral leaving him with a carer. Anyway, just got back from the funeral aftermath and my cousin rang to say that my uncle has gone real bad and might not last much longer. We aggreed not to tell the others till tomorrow (they are all drunk as skunks now anyway) but if he dies in the night i might feel awful that i knew and they didn't. It's all just too sad and i feel so on edge. Sorry this is a rambling post.

How awful for you linzoid, so sorry you're going through such a difficult time. Whether you tell the others about your uncle or not, you can only do what you think is best in a very difficult situation and that is what you are doing - there's nothing to feel bad about in that. {{hugs{}}} to you and good luck

Ah, a dreadful decision to have to make . My heart goes out to you, as well as big cyber hugs {{{{}}}}.

I think you're right not to tell them: they are grieving already and the worse for wear, so you may have to be strong for them tonight and hold onto the news about your uncle. Thinking of you... Let us know what happens.

Linzoid, sorry to hear this, it all sounds very distressing. I agree, your cousin (presumably one of ill uncle's children?) didn't want to tell the others, so I think you have to respect his/her wishes. If he dies in the night it really won't make any difference that you knew (by hours or a night or something) and they didn't. And if they've all just been to the funeral maybe it is better to wait 'til morning. You're not keeping totally new news from them (i.e. he just got sick), you're leaving an update for a few hours as your cousin wants you to. Please try not to feel guilty, nothing you can do will make a difference. Sorry this is so awful and of course you feel sad and edgy. It's normal so don't feel bad. I hope you manage to get some sleep.

lots of hugs linzoid {{{{{{{{}}}}}}}

Linzoid ... just wanted to add my hugs ... {{{}}}
A terribly difficult and sad time for you ... I am thinking of you and wish I could say more to make you feel better ....

Linzoild, I feel dreadful for you, send my love and wish you the best to get through tonight, I hope you don't feel too alone. What a terrible time for you all.

Linzoid, lots of hugs from me too. {{{{{}}}}}

Hugs from me too.

{{{{{{{{Hugs{}}}}}}}}}}