Don't people know how to behave any more?

[marthamoo]

Sorry chaps - huge rant coming on but I am seething and need to get this off my chest.

I went to see Grease last night, was really looking forward to it - it was a holiday treat for troutpout and I, going into Manchester for a night out.

Now Grease...it's not Chekhov, I know that: it's a mainstream musical with mass appeal. I expected the audience to indulge in a bit of foot tapping, clapping along, maybe a bit of singing. I have never experienced anything like it. Most (1/2 to 2/3rds of the audience - and the theatre was almost full) just seemed to have no idea how to behave in a theatre. People were talking all through it - not quietly, but like you would chat in a pub with loud music where you have to raise your voice to make yourself heard; people had brought in several alcoholic drinks apiece, which they proceeded to neck down - so then of course they had to keep getting up to go to the loo; some would pay attention long enough to sing along tunelessly at the tops of their voices - then talk all through the dialogue; the audience was lit up with small blue glowing screens - people were texting on their mobiles all the way through; some people were obviously incapable of even sitting still - kept getting up and going for a wander round the auditorium, or nipping out for a cigarette; people were taking flash photographs and had to be reprimanded by the ushers.

We moved after the first half because the man next door but one to tp talked incessantly in a loud voice - his girlfriend chatted back but did at least stop so she could sing along (badly and loudly) to the music. They must have paid £30 apiece for tickets, the same as us - why when they seemed to have no interest in actually watching the show? But where we moved to we had 4 women in front of us who also nattered on loudly through all the dialogue - a man nearby asked them to be quiet but they didn't take much notice.

It completely ruined it for both of us (and presumably the small minority of the audience who had gone along to enjoy the show). I felt sorry for the performers - especially the poor girl who played Sandy who was completely drowned out by tuneless wailing when she sang Hopelessly Devoted. It was like karaoke night down your local theme pub, not a theatre.

Don't people know what is acceptable behaviour any more? I wondered if some of the audience actually knew it was real people up there on stage or whether they thought it was computer generated. Honestly, it was so depressing - there seems to be a culture of people now who just have absolutely no consideration for anyone else, and no idea how to behave.

I know I sound like Mrs Angry of Macclesfield - but I am just gobsmacked and still seething.

It seems to me that a lot of people nowadays (oh I sound old) have lost the ability to sit still and concentrate. Even on a bus or a train - there was a time when you would sit and look out of the window and think your own thoughts - but now you have your mobile and you can be talking, texting, surfing the net, playing games, listening to music. Add the attention span of a gnat to a lack of consideration and empathy for anyone else - and you end up with an audience like the one we had to endure last night.

Sorry, warned you it was a rant.

I find this kind of behaviour is just as bad in the cinema as well. I also saw Rocky Horror on stage but the actors activly encouraged audience participation during the songs and made us dance in the aisles!!! On a complete reversal, I sat next to a miserable bloke who refused to join in!! IMO if you want to talk loudly, drink a lot, use your phone and make a nuisance of yourself, go down the pub. At least there's a chance of you being arrested!!

pmsl at the library story. Reminds me of when I worked in a second hand clothes and wool shop as a teenager and the local transvestite Jane (previously John) was a regular customer. He was a really ropey transvestite, very bad at it, lots of make up over 5 O'Clock shadow, and very ungainly. He once stood at the entrance to shop and boomed in "You got any drawers to fit me today love?" Two old ladies choosing their knitting wool nearly fell over and had to be revived with tea and apple pie.

I agree it's not the theatre's fault, but I think they'd put out more unambiguous messages if more people complained. But perhaps they're making more money from a mass market who don't know how to behave, than they would from the people who are now being put off going to theatres? I have to say though, it's never happened to me in a theatre, but it does happen in cinemas quite regularly. It's impossible to go to a film near me now, unless you do afternoons when all the yobbos are still in bed or at work. Hence the rise of home cinema systems I suppose - and another previously communal, sociable activity being privatised. Sad.

Just got back from a week in deepest darkest Wales with the outlaws to be informed by my Mum that the Manchester Evening News printed my email..oooh the excitement !

is this it? well done, you have put it very well. sadly i imagine most of the people there wont have the attention span to read it all..

It seems to me that a lot of people are very selfish. Courtesy and consideration for others seems to be something that people think restricts them in some way! A lot of people feel that they should have the freedom to do what they want, how and when they want, and those around them should just take it! Interestingly, these are the same people that complain long and loud when others are inconsiderate towards them! - Again, because the whole world should revolve around them and their needs with no consideration for anyone else.

They need slapping repeatedly with a 4 week old haddock.

Yes that's it, gigglinggoblin (oooh!)

I like the haddock idea, MissBegotten (excellent name, btw).

hehehe, not only a published writer but also famous on the internet!

I've come to this thread late, but I've experienced this every time we go to the cinema as well as other places (tho not the theatre yet- except during a production of the hobbit when the family in front opened rustly sweets continuously throughout the entire performance ). Last summer we went to a country park for a special activities day. There was a storyteller there & my kids (all teenagers) sat on his mat absolutely enthralled by his stories (he was very good).

I couldn't believe it when a family came up, chatting, stood behind us continuing to chat, and were shouting instructions to their kids over on the other side of the mat mid-story. He gave them a hard stare which they ignored. Their kids sat and listened for less than 5 minutes, then were up and racing off- and these were perhaps 10 and 11, not babies.

Everyone was relieved when they wandered off, only for another lot to come along having a chat...

DH has just reminded me that when we went to see the King and I recently (£35 per ticket, me him and DS1), a woman in front with a 10-12 yo girl talked all the way through between songs. I wanted to hear the dialogue as it's a show I was in many years ago (am dram) but they were obviously just there for the songs, and carried on their conversation throughout the "boring bits"

It's so difficult, because you don't want to cause a scene by asking them to be quiet because to make yourself heard then everyone else would be disturbed as well... then what happens if you ask them to be quiet and they either ignore you or talk even more? (Can you tell I can't do confrontation?!)

go moo go!

I really despise lack of basic good manners, I would have been so worked up if I'd have been there.

On a different note though, I worked/lived in Jamica for a few months one summer and the cinema over there is completely different to here. Everyone chats loudly, shouts at the actors on screen, laughs, smokes etc, at first it's really off putting but after a while you kind of get into it.
I don't understand why you would pay £30 to go to the theatre and then not watch it though, weird and bloody annoying.