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Advice please: children without a car

46 replies

TheChangeSpiral · 17/04/2010 20:57

Hello everyone

I've just found out I'm pregnant with my first child. As something of a greenie who has lived in London for the last few years, I don't have a car.

We'll be moving to Bristol before the little one is born and don't plan to get a car, which seems like an unusual lifestyle choice to most people. Is there anyone out there who could offer some advice on having children without a car? Preferably city-dwellers although London is a bit of a special case.

Many thanks in advance x

OP posts:
mitochondria · 17/04/2010 21:28

I lived in Bristol for several years and managed fine without a car - this was pre-children, but it's a compact place and there are plenty of buses and trains.

I'd like to be carless now - if I didn't live in a village with a rubbish public transport service I would.

scoutliam · 17/04/2010 21:29

Completely doable, we have a car seat which has come in handy as we use street car , the car share thingy occasionally.
Other than that dd goes in either her buggy or sling.

Street car or zip car is great for the odd car necessary trip and think they are both in Bristol also.

TheChangeSpiral · 17/04/2010 21:29

zippy539 We're thinking of the Gloucester Road are in the North West - it's where all the greenies like us live and has great transport links ;)

OP posts:
mitochondria · 17/04/2010 21:32

ChangeSpiral - if you moved to Gloucester Road you'd be the odd one out if you did have a car!

5inthebed · 17/04/2010 21:32

So general advice. Will you be carrying the baby in a sling or get a pram? Think about public transport, how you need to do your shopping, how much you walk etc. Get a heap car seat for coming home from hospital, maybe even try freecycle. We had a car seat for DS1, and used it maybe 5 times.

It is very doable imo, not backward at all. I grew up in South Africa, and there was no public transport so we walked everywhere and it never did us any harm.

Shitemum · 17/04/2010 21:37

We lived in a city of 300,000 with no car and 2 kids aged 2 and 5 yo. We did live in the centre tho' and very close to shops and nursery school. The only problem was getting to birthday parties but we usually got lifts with friends, one lot had a big van which was handy!
Now we are in a bigger city, kids are 3.5 and 6.5, but still in the centre and rely on my mum to go places at the weekend. We walk a lot, use the buses and sometimes the train tho' it usually means being picked up at the other end and then not being able to go anywhere while we are visiting as we won't all fit in our host's car.

Neither of us can drive but I am planning to learn as I don't want to rely on my mum forever, she is getting on.....

zippy539 · 17/04/2010 21:40

Oh thanks for that Changespiral - off to google..

schroeder · 17/04/2010 21:41

We didn't have a car until ds was 5 and dd 1 and we only got 1 then because dh had such a long commute.
It's perfectly ok and I still try not to use the car for journeys I would previously done on foot.
We chose our house so it was in walking distance to the town centre and the shops,there is a nearby bus stop,but I hardly ever use it- buggies on buses can be a bit stressful especially with a toddler and a baby(in a few years maybe)I always preferred my sturdy buggy and my own 2 feet.
You're lucky that internet shopping deliveries are so good now, I used to hate having to get a taxi when I had loads of shopping. And it is greener- 1 van with 10 people's shopping in is much better than 1 car with 1 person's shopping!

Alouiseg · 17/04/2010 21:42

Really wasn't being rude but for me it wouldn't work! We live over a mile away from the nearest bus stop.

Today my son had a Party 6 miles away, across the other side of our nearest town (Colchester) ds' school is 5 miles away and the catchment is quite large so school friends alone are not on the doorstep. We live in a rural area and I could not function without a car. Ds 2 was seriously I'll for 3 years and I would never have managed the trips to Cambridge/Colchester without a car. We had plenty of late night dashes to hospitals that would have been awful without a car.

Even our dentist is 4.5 miles away, dh starts work in London at 7am he has to be on a train at 5.30, needless to say he wouldn't want to walk over a mile to a bus stop to get a train even if the buses did run at that time of day.

For some of us it simply would not work.

TheChangeSpiral · 17/04/2010 21:42

justallovertheplace Thanks so much for your advice. I am indeed going to use reusable nappies. A friend of mine has promised me her hand-me-downs. I'm not the sort of person who coos over baby clothes at all but those little furry reusable nappies are adorable!

OP posts:
BikeRunSki · 17/04/2010 21:45

I grew up in London, one of 4 children and we didn't have a car. We walked a lot, buses, trains. All normal. Live in countryside now, hate my reliance on car.

BikeRunSki · 17/04/2010 21:49

It was SW London though, so not handy for tube.

Once a fortnight or so we used to do a "big" shop and come home in a taxi. As we got older, the big ones took the little ones on the bus. We needed 2 taxis otherwise!

zippy539 · 17/04/2010 21:51

See that's different Alouise - we're talking about not having a car in a city - in a lot of rural areas (but not all) it's a different story.

Where I live the bus top is 200 yards away, the school, dentist, supermarket, swimming pool, dance classes are all within half a mile and the doctors surgery is directly across the road etc. etc. Also city schools tend to have geographically smaller catchment areas - none of the dc's friends live more than ten minutes walk from the house.

It would be NUTS for us to run a car.

TheChangeSpiral · 17/04/2010 21:52

Alouiseg Thanks for responding again. I didn't think you were rude at all but I hope you understand now that I have many reasons for making this choice.

I'm really interested in continuing the conversation about managing without one though if you don't mind. Do you not think that without a car you'd just find ways on managing? None of the things you've mentioned have really seemed like insurmountable obstacles. Surely it's just a question of priorities?

I'm afraid that for a number of reasons, at some point in the really very near future regular car use is going to become a thing of the past for everyone. Do you not think it's better than we start to build a world that is better adapted to people without cars before this happens?

OP posts:
zippy539 · 17/04/2010 21:53

Changespiral - just dropped my wee yellow man from Google maps onto the Gloucester Road and was delighted to see so many buses! You'll be fine.

misdee · 17/04/2010 22:02

Alousie, i understand the ill thing. the main motivation for me learning to drive was that my dh was in a hospital 30miles away from my home and not on a bus/train route. i am glad i learnt to drive, and i suspect that at some point in teh next couple of years we may get another car. but for now we just dont need one. dh is better (he had a heart transplant in 2007), back at work locally, and is fighting fit

TheChangeSpiral · 17/04/2010 22:05

Hooray thanks zippy539

OP posts:
No134 · 17/04/2010 22:22

We didn't get a car until we had our third child. It's fine.

The break-even point for a car is about £8000 miles a year. Or you can look at it in terms of the costs of keeping a car on the road: £200 car tax, same again in insurance (minimum), plus MOT, service, parking permits etc. Unless you have a v. small or electric car you won't see much change from £1000 per year, and that's before you've actually bought the car or paid for petrol to go anywhere in it.

£1K a year will buy you a lot of taxis and hire cars. We used to get the bus and train (family railcard once you have dc over the age of 5). You do need to book ahead for the best rail deals, but you get quite canny at working out how to play the trainfare system. If we went away for a w/e or a holiday to somewhere not accessible by train we'd hire a car. If you find a reliable local hire firm you may be able to negotiate better deals. You could also look into car clubs as well -- they weren't around in our car-free days, but I would imagine the maths stacks up pretty well for occasional use.

Now that you can get buggies on buses life is v. v. much easier. When I had dc1 it was still mainly routemasters on the routes we used in London, and you had to fold the buggy, carry the baby, carry any bags and somehow heave it all onto the bus. Now you just push the buggy onto the bus. How hard can it be? It may also be worth getting a good sling, as buggies are still a pain on the underground and some local rail stations (steps).

For shorter journeys that you can't do on public transport or with luggage etc you can get taxis. It's a good idea to get an account with a good minicab firm, cos they tend to prioritise account customers and it saves having to faff around worrying about having the right money.

For supermarket shopping you get online delivery, and/or one of those old-lady trolleys, depending how close you live to a supermarket. I never quite stooped to the trolley thing but sort of piled it all up on the buggy. It's worth considering the luggage-carrying capacity when you look into choosing a buggy. A veg delivery box is also worth looking into, and working out where the good local shops are to reduce your dependence on supermarkets.

Honestly, there's nothing to it. The equation does change slightly when you have three children as once there are 5 of you, you don't fit in a normal minicab, and friends can't pick you up from the station unless they have a 7-seater etc etc. Plus we couldn't hire eg. a Ford Fiesta, cos we need something with a boot the size of Alaska, so the hire costs go up too. But with one child, or even two, it's a piece of cake. It just requires a bit of organisation, and the ability to balance the upfront cost of taxis against the annual cost of buying and owning a car. Unless you are doing a lot of journeys to out-of-the-way places or live out in the sticks, it's almost always going to be cheaper to not own a car.

Ignore people who say otherwise -- car owners are getting stung more with every passing year, so it makes no sense to get a car unless you have no alternative. Honestly, one little baby, or even a toddler or older child on public transport is not a bit deal. Plus they get quite robust about walking for reasonable distances instead of turning into little weeds who bleat as soon as they have to walk further than 100 yards. If you have a real walking refusenik you can get a pedal-less bike or one of those microscooters. But that's a few years down the line.

janeite · 17/04/2010 22:30

Totally agree that ime children of non-car-owning parents are more resiliant walkers!

zippy539 · 17/04/2010 22:47

Agree about the resiliant walker thing. We've just been on a non-car walking holiday (or should that be a 'bus man's' holiday!) with a six and eight year old. They were happily tramping three/four miles a day (in fact running most of it) which is more than I can say for me.

BertieBotts · 19/04/2010 11:43

I don't have a car - great advice on this thread! Just wanted to jump in with recommendations for car seats for non drivers - these are lightweight, last a long time and fit in almost all cars.

For babies, firstly decide whether you want one which goes on your pushchair or not. Pros of this is that you can get a bus somewhere and then a lift back, or vice versa. Cons are that it limits you either in choice of pushchair, or to a more expensive car seat, and you probably won't use it on the pushchair often anyway.

If you decide to get the compatible one then obviously that is your choice sorted. If compatability is not an issue, then go for the Mothercare Travel Tot. It is one of the cheapest on the market, but is sturdy, safe and lightweight. It is larger than some other infant seats so you can use it for longer (DS fitted in his until 18 months). It has a handle so you can carry them out asleep (a godsend!) It's about £50 but compared to £110 which is average for this age I think that's a good deal. You can sometimes get discount codes online as well.

The next stage is 1-4 years, I recommend the Kiddy Infinity Pro. It's much lighter than other seats and it fits very easily into every car I have tried it in with the 3-point seatbelt, it's safer than a normal 5-point harness as well and seems very comfy. I like how you can adjust the seat and the headrest for different ages. It's about £130 which is about average for this age group, but TBH the cheaper seats don't seem as trustworthy to me at this stage, since these are the biggest and most complex seats. You use it for three+ years though so I think that it's good enough value.

I haven't got to the next stage yet but I would say it's probably an idea to get one of the high-back boosters which convert into a normal booster seat so that you have both options.

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