I am such a saddo and i can't get a grip

[peaceandlight]

I can't even explain what is wrong, i just feel bad and anxious

awwwww... is it an anxiety attack type feeling?
If something specific were bothering you, what might it be?

little things just send me into a panic and then the anxious feeling lasts.

ridiculously was worrying about the school holidays on sunday, took time to actually question myself as to what i was exactly worried about and i was most worried that the kids might get poorly which is an ongoing fear sending me into blind panick if they get a temperature or something.

Then, ds2 goes and falls out of a tree, whacking his head and ever since i have been feeling terrible. Last time we spent the night in hospital with concussion.

All i can think tonight is that dp is the other end of the country working tomorrow and my mum is away. What will i do if something bad happens?
I would probably cope but my irrational brain just keeps telling me otherwise. I have got butterflies in my stomach and i can't eat.

I know i am probably not making sense here. How many 30 year olds still need someone around to hold their hand? I am pathetic. i am totally not confident in dealing with things, always fearing horrible things might happen, that i won't make the right descisions, that i will panic

i'll shut up because i'm pretty sure this has all come out wrong.

peaceandlight (love your name!) what if you write down things that might go wrong, and then write down what you could do about it?

It might help if you see it in black and white and then, if something does happen, you have already worked out some strategies.

i'll give it a go

for the last few weeks i have worried about ds2 playing outside in case he got stung by a wasp in case he happens to be one of those people who have anaphalactic shock. leaving him at school i have even said to him to watch out for wasps!

I am a mental case aren't i? surely that is not normal?

I think it's normal to worry. Worrying helps you to look ahead and anticipate problems.

However, if you're feeling anxious all the time, maybe you're suffering from stress? Have you thought of seeing your GP? Or chatting things through with your HV or your dh/mum?

What I have found helpful in settling worries I have, is trying to deal with them on a practical level. So I think them through and decide how I might deal with the 'what ifs'. In your situation, I might go on a first aid course or get a really good first aid book.

Can you rely on a friend to help out if something happens when dh and your mum are away?
Just knowing there was someone you could call on, could help.