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Original poster

Please tell me there are more parents out there who like to keep their 8 year olds like 8 year olds?

73 replies

anniebear · 28/12/2009 08:27

feel a bit on my own at the mo. I know everyone parents differently.......

I have two 8 year old girls, they have IPods , DS's, like Miley Cyrus ect

But they dont have mobiles or go on Facebook and I am careful what they watch on TV

I have just seen on FB a child from School who is 9 :0

Then more of their friends are getting mobiles, say they watched Im a celeb get me out of here, Eastenders!

I am not having a go at those parents, each to their own, but it is so hard when I tell DD's they can have mobile when they start walking to school on own, no way are they watching Adult progs, they dont need to know certain stuff yet..then their school friends do

why do people want their 'children' to do all these older things (and make my life more difficult lol lol)

Please tell me Im not alone!

Just felt like having a litle moan !

OP posts:
squilly · 28/12/2009 10:38

I have an 8 year old dd who wrote a list to santa this year asking for her 4 gifts...kit kat chunkies, Galaxy bar, Mario Galaxy on Wii and Playmobil Roman Commanders Tent.

That was it. No ipods, mobile phones, etc. She hates HSM...none of us watch X Factor or Strictly or any of that kind of thing.

She likes movies more than tv, so we don't have much that she watches. Just Bamzooki, Sarah Jane, Dr Who, Shaun the Sheep. That kind of thing.

And she's a jeans and tee shirt girl. No logos, not much pink, nothing provocative at all.

My 8 year old is not typical, but she doesn't want to be. She has lots of friends, so it's not affecting her 'cool' rating....she's just a self assured wee thing who knows what she likes.

She'll get a mobile phone when she goes to secondary school. It'll be a cheap thing from Argos (no more than £30) and it'll be on a PAYG rather than a contract so she doesn't get it nicked.

8 year olds tend to grow at their own pace to some degree. How they are influenced by friends and relations will impact on how quickly they grow. I'm just heartened to see how many other mums have young 8 yos too..

bb99 · 28/12/2009 10:59

If it makes you feel better, we don't let our nearly 14 yo go on facebook or have a personal free access computer and were chatting to friends the other day who are involved with IT and have experience of this and they told us about the fact that anything you put on the net is basically permanently stored, even if you delete it, in about 3 locations around the world...

Chat rooms (I think) are the only totally wiped part of the internet, so anything (stoopid, daft, innappropriate) that anyone puts up on the net is there for keeps, and children have an alarming ability to do daft things and post them.

I know employers who automatically 'google' someone when they apply for a job so ahem...(or it could be the Xmas paranoia has finally got to me )

DC got a mobile when they went to secondary school - a cheap one - so I could track them down as necessary.

On the other hand dc does cycle to and from evening activities and has a lot of freedom there, so it's not a total lock down in our home...

purpleduckUnderTheMistletoe · 28/12/2009 11:17

My dd is nearly 8, and has no interest in Eastenders and theres no way I would let the dcs watch those kind of shows. I don't like Hannah Montana either (we did watch for awhile, but noticed she is a terrible role model - she is a nasty little madam!)

I think iPods are fine - ds (10) has one, but he loves music.

They will not have their own laptops for a very long time as I don't want them to be exposed to all the crap the internet has to offer. I don't have alot of faith in the parent guard thingy's. And I want them to be dependant on their own ability to spell/write/add etc before they start using a computer.

cornsilkcremeeggspotter · 28/12/2009 11:34

My ds is 8. He has a dsi, a PSP. His older brother has a wii and PS3 but ds2 is rarely allowed on! He tells me that everyone else in his class watched I'm a celebrity and that he's the only one who didn't. I highly doubt that is true!

Original poster
anniebear · 28/12/2009 23:00

well of course we will all have our own ways, but Im pretty happy with the replies!

next time DD monas at me about the phone I will tell her that lots of Mums on the internet said their children dont have them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thank you

OP posts:
fortyplus · 28/12/2009 23:04

My two are 14 and 16.

They've been on FB about a year.

They had mobiles at 11 when they went to secondary school.

We didn't get the ps2 till ds1 was 11.

They had iPods a couple of years ago.

No TV in the bedroom - even now.

bibbitybobbitysantahat · 28/12/2009 23:10

I have an 8 year old who is very nearly 9. Not one of her friends has a phone, a tv in their room, or access to facebook. Some of them have ds lites and mp3 players. We live in London, the children all go to state primary schools. Hth.

undertheboredwalk · 28/12/2009 23:20

I think I'm one of them you're talking about
Dd is almost 9, she has a mobile but it's only for contact with her dad when she's here and me when she's there. She got a netbook for Christmas, but is only interested in age appropriate stuff and is supervised anyway. She has a barbie Mp3 player and a tv/dvd thing in her bedroom, that was bought because we don't actually have a dvd player and she's the only one that watches them.
I think all of this stuff is fine actually if it's used responsibly i.e The new laptop lives in the front room and she can only use it where I can see her, her TV has no aerial so she cant watch any unsuitable tv and always checks if it's ok to watch a dvd. Mobile is always left in the house when she's with me and I' check it every couple of days. There is nothing she owns that she wouldn't have acess to anyway I don't see the problem with her owning her own instead of 'borrowing' mine all the time lol

northender · 28/12/2009 23:20

My 8yo ds got various playmobil Egyptian sets for Christmas (never having had PM before). TV is very controlled as to what he's allowed to watch. He got a ds for his 8th birthday(with a few age approp games). He and his sister both love playing and listening to music so I think ipods will be the next things. Technology is not a bad thing per se but at 8 it needs a lot of parental control/guidance imo.
We despair at some of the tv and console games some of his peers are allowed or actively encouraged to watch/play.

thirdname · 28/12/2009 23:32

ds 9 got a ds for Xmas, no ipod/tv/computer/mobile/MP3. But if he happens to watch Eastenders I wouldn't switch it off if he wants to see it (although I don't think he everhas, he would normally be in bed I think).

dd of 4 did want a ds as well ha-ha, didn't get it though I was amazed she knew what it was....

thirdname · 28/12/2009 23:35

O, but I don't think they are "growing up to fast" if they do have these things, I just think it is a waste of money. They all have free access to tv, computer etc.

islandofsodor · 28/12/2009 23:36

I have an 8 year old dd. She does like MNiley Cyrus, HSM etc but she also loves most musical theatre, she has sort of been exposed to it all her life dh being a vocal coach and she has an ipod shuffle which currently has HSM, Hannah Montana, We Will Rock You (edited by dh), Guys & Dolls The Spice Girls and Andy Abraham!!!

The last two are becasue she was part of childrebn's choir that sang with Andy and also for a Spice Girls tribute act!)

She mostly watches Nick Jr and Cartoonito on TV or anything that involves dancing.

She has just had a laptop for xmas (bought by grandparents) and is restricted to children's sites. So far I see she has gone onto a website associated with her drama school, Cbeebies, Club Penguin, HSM and the We will rock you theatre show website. Internet access is downstairs under supervisison.

I told her tonight that she can have facebook when she is 13. She will be allowed a mobile when she goes to high school and will be getting the school bus.

I feel that she is very young for her age in ots of ways, however in others she is very mature and focused, she wants to join an agency and audition for shows and seems to understand all the implications!!!!!

Northernlebkuchen · 29/12/2009 00:04

dd1 has just got a phone for christmas and she is nearly 12. Dd2 (now 8) will be waiting to similar age and only got a ds this year having pined for one for three years! NO facebook - ugh! Club Penguin was as far as I'm going for a few years and no Eastenders. They do watch Topgear sometimes and we taped Life for them. Other than that Tracey Beaker is quite racy enough

Hulababy · 29/12/2009 10:02

I can understand why people don't like their children to have TVs, and to a slight degre computers and games machines even. All the inactive stuff, just sat in front of it all day, doing nothing else (mind do anyone's children really do this?)

However I just don't get why people don't want their childre to have MP3 players or iPods, and even some not even a CD player of their own. Why? What is wrong with chilren wanting to listen to and enjoy their own music?

7y DD adores music and quite a range of music too from the likes of HSM and Hannah Montana, to musicals like Joseph and Oliver, and to more modermn music the likes you get on the Now that's what I call..., Take That, new Robbie stuff, Vampire Weekend, Ting Tings, etc.

She spends ages singing and dancing either with friends or on her own. She has a microphone she sings along with. She makes updance routines, she makes up her own lyrics. The music inspires her to write down her own songs, to get manuscript paper out and write down simple tunes of her own and to play them on her piano, singing vocals along side.

Music is really quite an important to DD, and she gets quite a lot from it. Why would anyone feel that allowing a child an iPod and docking station to listen to her own music could be a negative?

SleepingLion · 29/12/2009 11:07

I don't think it's listening to music that I have an issue with with ipods - DS, who is 6, has a CD player in his room and listens to his story CDs all the time. What worries me about him having an ipod is the damage it can do to their ears if they listen through headphones a lot.

If the ipod is in a docking station and they're listening through speakers, I don't see what the problem is.

thirdname · 29/12/2009 11:11

NOthing against music, apart from when it's loud, certainly if as mentioned by sleepinglion through earphones (lot more deafness amongs young pople recently because of it).

Just don't want to go into the race to buy all these gadgets for all 3 dc.

JingleAllTheWay · 29/12/2009 11:15

DS has a friend who aches spooks ffs.

They were 9 then.

Hulababy · 29/12/2009 11:25

Ah, DD always used the iPod (which was our old one infact) in her docing station at home. And the occasional time she listens out of the house we have bought some nice children's size out of hear headphones, as I felt they were better for her than inear ones (which she wasn't keen on anyway).

I guess becuase I like technology and gadget stuff, it influences what I like for DD and what she likes too.

Why does she has a netbook? Well, I have a laptop, I love IT, she likes using computers, I don't want to share my latop with a child.

Why does she has a DS? as above and mainly - I don't want to share mine.

I also guess that if you have the kind of child who gets obsessed by these things, esp the consoles, then that woud make you think twice. DD never has been, we have never had to impose time limits, etc. as she doesn't play with any of them for long periods of time.

And she still remains quite a young Y3 girl IMO, definitely no different to her peers.

Also to pick up on another comment. My DD does like HSM and Hannah Montana, etc. But not because her peers do. Infact many don't. She simply likes it because she choses to like it, not to follow a crowd or be like her friends.

mrsvwoolf · 29/12/2009 11:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TinselianAstra · 29/12/2009 11:39

I like what Flamingo says - obviously you should protect your child from inappropriate things but it's silly to try to keep her at some arbitrary definition of 'being an 8 year old'.

Technology is not bad, even if some of its applications might be.

poinsettydawg · 29/12/2009 11:41

I don't see that much difference between a ds and a mobile phone.

poinsettydawg · 29/12/2009 11:45

and what's wrong with fashion?

foxinsocks · 29/12/2009 11:46

I like your western name pointy. Makes me feel all Clint Eastwoody.

poinsettydawg · 29/12/2009 11:48

Clint Eastwoody and Christmoosy?

foxinsocks · 29/12/2009 11:55

yes though it did make me think of Hot Diggity Dawg first before Christmas. Who used to say that on TV?

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