What's the stupidest thing anyone's ever said involving kids?

[Pruni]

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FIL - "dip his dummy in some honey, that should keep him quiet"

ME - "snort"

FIL - "well that's what my mum did and i'm fine!"

DC - PMSL at 'bint'!! Forgotten how much I loved that word!

Middle-aged Lady, admiring ds1, I was pg at the time.
LADY: "he's a lovely placid baby"
ME : " thank you!"
LADY: "My son was like that, then when I had his brother he got very jealous and now he's depressed. So when you have your new baby, he'll probably get depression too.

I've got loads mostly from my mother

"if she falls she might hurt herself"

"babies should have proper milk (ie from a cow so what was she getting out my boobs then)?"

oh she also told me I looked really fat whilst pregnant especially my face (the last time she saw me was at 5 months and I had only gained a stone

on seeing Dds picture for the first time she said she looked "fat and ginger" FFS how can a 6lb baby look fat?

can't think of nay more right now but she comes out with crakcers on a daily basis

My MIL on being told that we were thinking of having some studio photographs taken of dd when she was 3: "Oh, I wouldn't bother if I were you, dd's not exactly attractive, is she".

My MIL on being told that I intended to breastfeed for as long as I could: "You're only breastfeeding so that I don't get to feed dd".

My MIL when dd was 5 weeks old and keeping me up all night: "If she was being this naughty for me, I'd give her a smack".

'A girl? Well, that's not a very feminine noise, is it!'

Stupid STUPID old git looking at wailing eight month old DD1 on the train

"Are they twins?" (ds1 and ds2 in double buggy; ds1 sitting up, aged 2, wearing shoes ,feet on footrest, ds2 aged 5m lying flat, little feet just reaching the edge of the seat)
"Er, no. This one's the big brother though"
"Well they look very alike!"
???

I honestly think that some people can't help themselves saying things when they see children. I think most mean well but the signal gets lost somewhere between brain and mouth.

Your comments are cracking me up.

"Is it a boy or a girl?"

DD at 5 months dressed in pink flowery dress with pink flowery bloomers and a violet cardigan

me: "he's a boy"

DD1, recovering from chicken pox with a few dried up and non infectious marks on face, out shopping. Old woman turns to her DH and says "ooh, look at that poor wee mite - covered in excema. I bet her mother bottle fed her, I read about that in the paper..." GRRRRR

The other day I was in a shop with DS (1yr) in his pushchair. He had the most angelic expression that day and was being unusually quiet.

The shop assistant looked at me and said "Oh, rather you than me!"
"What's that" I said
"Kids" she says

Odd, really odd.

when i came back from new zealand after 10 yrs, i went at 10 yrs old the amount of people that came up to me and said "havent you grown dear" i should bloody well hope so!not much admittidly.

WWW oh about "If she was being this naughty for me, I'd give her a smack". How awful!

She must be related to my MIL - when my DS was two weeks old and I was demand feeding (BF) "put in the pram at the bottom of the garden so you can't hear him - he's not hungry - he's just trying you on" (I NEVER ignore my child's cries )

BAsketcase, that comment is not rare. DS had severe eczema and instead of people being symphatetic to him they used to look reprobingly at me

Do people also know that BF babies can get severe eczema too?

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I was looking at flowers in Tesco when I noticed an old man talking to ds (then 8 months old) sitting in shopping trolley happily.

Old man : Oh you're cute son, you're lovely
DS : gurlgle gurgle
Me : Smiles to acknowledge him
Old man : You're gonna wish you were never born
This is a wicked world, wicked, awful
world it is
Me : Hurriedly pushed trolley whilst
looking depressed

I did pmsl laughing later though.

FIL on hearing that we're having a girl this time - "Well, your troubles start now."

Said friend went to the GP and came back very annoyed that the doctor asked her if the baby was able to understand English. I really don't know what was more strange if my friend being annoyed by the question and explaining that girl understood 3 languages or the GP asking that question about a 7 m old girl

PMSL at Pinotmum's, there are some strange people around....

before our friends had children - oh your dd is walking really well now isn't she?
(she was about 2 and had been walking for a year!)

stilltrue - I got that once - "Oh twins! A boy and a girl!"
Me: No, 2 boys actually and there's 20 months between them.....

Although one of them had a red coat on so possibly a bit girly

A woman once asked my sister in a shop when her baby was due, It happened to be the next day so my sister replied 'tomorrow actually'.
The woman then asked 'oh lovely, what time?

On meeting my (then) 14 week old son for the first time:

Friend: "So, is he walking and stuff yet?"

Me:"Er, no, he's only 3 months old"

Friend: "Oh. Right." (whilst looking unimpressed). "It's because he's a boy isn't it. Girls develop faster than boys. You should have had a girl."

We were once asked when out as a family "oh is he adopted?" DS is not adopted and so was offended on that front and if he had been adopted would have still been miffed that they thought it ok to ask complete strangers that.