Meeting up with people from websites

[BigBird]

Hi - what do you all think about meeting up with other people from website discussions (like here!). Any advice ?
I am not in the UK so not talking about this site but a local site similar to this where one Mum is looking for a meet-up in my area. I have been ho-humming all day.....when would we meet, what would we say to each other, what if I don't like her/she doesn't like me and I don't want to swap numbers at the end etc. Also - is it safe....could there be lurkers out there who'll also show up... (maybe I am a bit OTT!). I would prob feel better if there was a group meeting but for now there's only the 1 mum looking to meet. It's a bit nerve-wrecking....like setting up a blind date or something.

Advice appreciated from those who have been there, done that.

I've met two internet friends. Spoke to both on the phone beforehand. Both were from autism websites. One is now one of my best friends (I moved from London so she was living just round the corner). The other visits when she comes here on holiday and we talk a lot on the phone.

Bigbird, I've made a great friend from an internet parenting site, too. We emailed each other first, then spoke on the phone, then met in a soft play area/ball pit type of place. If it had turned out from emailing that we didn't have much in common (I think we were both looking for someone with a child of a similar age, and boys - that kind of thing) we probably wouldn't have met up, but it worked out and we see each other with our children every few weeks. Good luck!

I have gone on countless webmeets from message board friends, to usenet people, to gaming friends. Always had a fantastic time, and never had any problems (usual precautions taken though until you know them better - neutral public place, etc, etc). Got on pretty well with all the people I thought I would get on well with.

Only ever had one "problem" person but I'd met him in RL before I knew him online (started stalking me online which was pretty horrible) so I don't think that really counts.

Bigbird, I've met people from websites and it's always been OK. Agree about usual precautions, tell someone where you're going, meet in a public place, don't swap numbers until you're sure about them etc. etc. I have several real life friends as a result of mumsnet so I'd say it's worth it for sure. Can you email each other off board to make arrangements? That way you'll know there won't be any lurkers turning up as none of them will have the details. You could always set up a hotmail account just for this, you don't have to post your usual email address.

BigBird, I organised the very first mumsnet meet-up (with some extra moral support from two other regulars) and have made some really good friends from that and from socialising with other Mumsnetters in my part of the world.
My advice would be to make the actual arrangements off-board so that lurkers are not aware of where you are meeting etc. Also, as it is a sort of blind date, meet somewhere public and for a specified time (an hour for coffee one morning for example) so that both of you can make a hasty, graceful exit if you decide you don't hit it off.
Having said all that, none of those precautions would have been necessary in my experience, so I should go for it and hopefully have a great time.