Life Dilemmas: would you give a second chance to........

[Earlybird]

--a nanny candidate who completely forgot the interview appointment and realised on when you left a voicemail asking where she was?

-a first date who didn't show up and left you sitting in the restaurant?

--a new businss contact who is 'thrilled you've chosen us to take care of your business' but double books and misses the first official meeting?

Assume all 3 realise they've made a huge mistake and call with an apology several hours later.

Would you give any (or all) a second chance? Why or why not? What would you say?

only

Wouldn't give second chance to nanny if she 'just forgot'. It would make me worry that she would forget to collect the children or would leave me in the lurch by not arriving for work on time. Reliability is an important part of the job.

For date, I would be pretty miffed but would give them a chance if they were apologetic and I was keen on them.

For business contact, would possibly give them another chance. It depends what the job is and whether reliability/time-keeping is an important part of ti.

My wife (girlfriend then) threatened to end our relationship when I was 20 minutes late to meet her about 2 weeks after we started going out together. I thought this was a bit harsh as she had kept me waiting for an hour on our first date witout a word of complaint from me.

No to all three in my view.

Interesting thoughts.

In all three of the scenarios, the relationship is a new one, so there is no historical good will accrued.

It is hard to judge when an honest and unusual mistake has been made, and when the 'flakiness' is a huge red flag for what is to come in the future.

Any other thoughts?

Wondering when/if a 'second chance' is OK, and when it is best to simply move on.

no
no
yes

no to all three

no to all three, especially the first, as we were spectacularly let down by a nanny who made a similar mistake, and then one day just did not turn up to collect the children from school... I should have gone with my gut reaction that she was unreliable.

ramona - why 'yes' to the third scenario (the business contact)?

Nanny - Yes. I'd certainly give him/her another crack at an interview but I would discuss any residual concerns about his/her timekeeping / time management in the second interview.

Date - Only if something catastrophic had happpened such as death / sudden sickness of family member. If they just 'forgot' or didn't call to say that they had transport problem or some other minor issue then I would assume that they were flaky or just plain not interested and write it off as a bad job.

Business - Depends on how much the contract was worth. I wouldn't cut off my nose to spite my face in the current climate.

Nanny - would put me off big time.

First date could forget he ever knew my name or number. Bye, bye!

Business partner would get a second chance, but would have to be ultra punctual and professional next time.