Bit of a dilemma please come and advise me

[dilemma456]

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I would send a card to the neighbour expressing sadness at her loss and regret that (despite what your mother arranged ) that you wont be able to go as kids too young and no available childcare

I have been to several funerals with wailing/messing about kids - twas awful and disrespectful.

Is there anyone else who can watch your DD?

TBH I am not sure she will understand enough what is going on to be overly upset, and even if she was, children that age tend to forget their upset very quickly, as I am sure you know

Why did your mother think it was appropriate to bring a 3 year old?

Ech, I wouldn't want to take a child that young to a funeral of someone they didn't even know either. I wouldn't want to take a child that young to a funeral of someone they did know, tbh.

I think a sympathy/condolences card and maybe some flowers or a donation to their charity, whichever is appropriate, would be a perfectly reasonable alternative to actually going. Take DD elsewhere for the day.

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