We have a coffee invite with the neighbours and I am very nervous it is going to turn into a Leageue of gentlemen you be strangers event. Wish me luck.

[twinsetandpearls]

My family and I just do not fit in on our road, we are very obviously a northern working class family who are fish out of water. We live on a road of old, reserved very settled dorset types. THe house is rented and everyone knows that as it belonged to a lady who lived in the house from when it was built.

We live next door to the cultural movers and shakers of the town who often have garden parties or intellectual gatherings. DD often stands at the bottom of their garden when such things are happening and yells in her northern dulcet tones " Mum the neighbours are being posh again".

I did send around some baking when we moved in and we do get the odd smile or hello but nothing else. Dp who works from home, so is here all the time, says he feels quite uncomfortable on this road and wants to move.

Last week, cultural movers and shakers knock on the door and say do come around for coffee.

I am convinced that all our neighbours are going to be there and they are going to chant at us "You be strangers" while their eyes go red and start to spin."

What do you wear for such an event? Should I take anything. I actually don't think I can as nothing is open around here.

I think you should dress as you feel comfortable, smile and relax. If they didn't like you or want to get to know you they wouldn't invite you, would they?

"this is a local road for local people" ha ha ha

Dp is convinced they have invited us so they can list all the things we have done to lower the tone of the neighbourhood.

Do ypur neighbours have a slightly Black & White Minstrel look about them? Do they call everyone Daaaave? If so, don't go.

If not, go along, drink some coffee, eat some cake and you may be pleasantly surprised.

Do you think they will serve "special stuff"?

You wear your normal clothes with a bit of lippy and mascara if that's what you normally do. they'll probably turn out to be nice normal people. Just with southern accents. But they can't help that.

LOL at your DD, that's funny. I want to know what sets her off. What do they do???

oh, they are just being friendly I expect

move away if you dislike the locals so much

We will go and I want to be surprised but I do feel as if I have been summoned to the headmasters office.

We don;t dislike anyone, we just feel as if we don't fit in. People just don;t move from these houses, mainly I think because of the stunning views. So most people have lived on this road for30 odd years and we are the youngests on the street by at least 30 years. No other families, mostly retired etc.

Moving is not that simple, we have signed a contract.

I have left my make up bag at work as well so will have to go looking likr a rough old dog.

I think it sounds nice they have invited you - just turn up with some biscuits and smile, it'll be fine

PeaMcLean dd is fascinated by them.

I suppose being a child she has never seen a party that was for adults only so it is fascinating. They tend to be in the afternoon as well, so I suppose to a 7 year old seeing lots of people dressed up and chatting in the garden, music playing etc is fascinating.

I will send dp to Morrisons, ( if you lived here you would know how exciting a trip to MOrrisons is ) to get some posh biscuits.

Oh go and see what it's like - I am sure it will be a giggle. Don't feel like you have to be someone you're not. Do tell us what it was like

See, I wouldn't take biscuits. You'll spend too much time worrying about whether they're the "right sort" of biscuits.

I won;t be someone I am not, I can never make it last. I am dreading dd coming out with one of her statements though.

Is it a yes or no to buscuits,

Was going to do flowers but they may be allergic.

When we talk when we go into town people stop and stare at us because of our accents. We are constantly asked where we are from. At work I am the constant butt of thick northerner jokes, which doesnt really bother me but illustrates that I am seen as an outsider. When I first moved here I felt very self conscious.

Oh how lovely. They're being friendly.

Or they may burn you at the stake.

But make sure whatever happens you get your slice of cake first.

The other thing that is worrying me is that our house is full of huge windows, including a full length one on the landing. I still have not got used to this and am still wandering about naked only to realise the whole road can see me.

What if they want to tell ne to stop subjecting them to my lardy folds.

How long have you been there? It's awful feeling you stick out like a sore thumb everytime you open your mouth, I get that when I go up to where DH's family live.

lol showofhands.

I had a similar thing when our neighbour invited us round for a cup of tea at New Year. We knew her slightly already but was convinced she was going to corner us about some transgression etc etc (guilty conscience due to a LOT of DIY).

Among topics of general conversation were planning issues for a vacant site across the road from us. She was just trying to drum up support.

I don't think people generally invite their neighbours round to list all their faults in painful detail in front of other neighbours - but yours may be an exception to this rule .

Anything you take along is a lovely gesture imo, I'm sure they will be very grateful.

Wear smart casual. If you've got time send DH to Honeybrook to get some biscuits or cake. Ask the old set things along the lines of what things are there going at Christmas, where is the best place to get your Christmas flowers from, best place to order meat, get them onto the subject of horses, who sells eggs from their chickens,what carol services will there be, when will the lights be turned on,what is Kingston Lacey like as you've read they do Christmas craft sessions.

They will accept you for who you are, it just takes a bit of time and you need to keep up as you have been doing with all the local stuff.

We moved in August.

I did a parents evening last week and while everyone was lovely almost every parent made a comment about "Oh so you are the northern lady" as well as "You must feel so lucky to have come up here" as if I ad escaped the Black Death.

Where or what is honeybrook? We are due in half an hour.

I could ask which is the best butcher - we have two and I know one is much better than the other but have forgotten which,

We are also regular faces at the museum, dd goes to a club there, and he is involved in the running of that.

lol - I would have a bit of fun with it.