What was your grottiest Christmas? (Antidote to smug 'traditions' thread)

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I was beginning to puke reading that thread: "Oh, we have 467 people all singing in our barn, and the villagers have a tradition of tugging their forelocks at our dcs, all clad in their Boden pyjamas..."

Anyway, my worst Christmas was after my father died. My mother cancelled Christmas, stayed in bed and refused to participate. I sat downstairs with a bottle of Iceland wine (everywhere else was closed by the time I came home from work on Christmas Eve) and watched Casualty, in which most people were killed in unfestive pile-ups.

andiem...please say you don't speak to her now?

How much time have you got? About 5 Christmases in a row when my mum and dad were about to divorce / had divorced and my dad was still at my mum's throat, turning up and ranting on Xmas morning and making the whole day stressful.

Two Christmasses in a row when my horrible ex-boyfriend caused a huge row (including one Xmas when he physically ejected me from his car on the way to Xmas lunch at a friend's!).

she died so I don't have to

andiem - for you and at your mil.

TheDevilWearsPrimark - I wasn't laughing at Blu's situation, really, but she does write in a really amusing way.

1. when sister woke up Christmas morning being sick, went to a&e, ended up having appendix out and staying in hosp. The rest of us at home trying to stick to plan for the day...and my dad threw one of my mum's friends in the swimming pool (we lived abroad at the time) which would have been just about ok but she had on a v expensive watch and went nuts at him - actually as kids we found it all quite funny (apart from my sis that is

2. mum decide to try new slow cook of turkey plan while we all went out to church, returned to charcoaled inedible turkey...made ok by boxing day going to the races and betting & winning on a horse called Burnt Offering

3. 2 years ago when family were here and we all got horrid d&v and most of us couldn't eat anything for days. and ds1 started waking at night as i wasn't giving him anything in my milk. great.

not as sad as some, sorry to all those who now have lost family members to remember at christmastime

TDWP, you've never met my parents. It was, believe me, utterly cold and horrible. No element of genuine pleasure, spontanaiety or indeed warmth about it. Isolated as fck, with the realisation that other people were actually happy somewhere else - possibly even next door.

I don't have one dramatically worse than the others. Just, like MI, a succession of Family Christmases being increasingly awful throughout adolescence. Culminating in the last time my nuclear family ever congregated for Christmas, we 3 children were all late teens, it was constant argument ending in our biggest all-family row ever (and that's saying something, we were a very argumentative family) with 4 of us shrieking and screaming and almost a stand up fight between my brother and father. With my mother still trying to pretend we were actually a happy family that got on.

It might not sound that bad but, 20 years on, none of us have ever been back to my parents for Christmas since. And my mother is still trying to pretend that we are a normal happy family that gets on.

and of course we haven't sorted out who's doing what this year. we are staying at home regardless - my new rule since having children. we are NOT trawling around the country!
others are welcome though i think that may have backfired as i anticipate parents, in-laws, bro & fiance & other bro this year, not sure where we'll put them alll!

My grandmother died on Christmas day, so that was a great year.

And a few years ago I picked up a bug and spent the entire day throwing up, which was nice.

Last christmas was awful. Supposed to be a beautiful family tableau of me, DH and our new 3 week old baby spending time together. Couldn't breastfeed properly. Baby not even managed to put birth weight on. Midwives telling me formula was devils work. Baby cries. I have mastitis and nipple agony. Midwife weights DS on christmas eve to stop me worrying over christmas, expecting baby to have put on weight. He's lost weight. I cry all day christmas eve and christmas. Brother comes round with niece and give me and DS the shits and vomiting virus. Happy christmas.

my crappy Xmas really doesn't compare to the others on here so I shall shut up.

but I couldn't stomach the other thread either. Where are the traditions of Mum/Bil coldly ignoring each other across the table, mum giving wholly inappropriate presents to everyone, and dc's winding each other up with the tension of it all?

Xmas 2 years ago.

My Granddad died at the beginning of Dec, my mum was devastated. Then the funeral had to be delayed until the new year due to all the undertakers being overbooked or ill.

We then had my sister coming home for just Christmas eve so we did the full xmas thing then - which just felt wrong.

We woke up xmas day all with heavy colds, spent the time sorting the kids room and snuggled up under duvets with lemsip - and had a fry up because none of us could face cooking or eating xmas dinner.

My Dad died unexpectedly three days before Christmas. DH and I got home from Mum's on the 2nd January only to discover that a pipe had burst in the loft and had been leaking for days causing major damage. DH then got up next day to return to work only to discover some little b*stard had nicked his car. It took six months to complete the repair work to the house. Happily, DD arrived in time for the following Christmas - the best present my Mum could have had.

My hyperemesis Christmas wasn't great. I remember throwing up when my dad lit a candle.

i have no recollection of xmas day when i was younger

wtf?

we didn't do dinner as was just mum and me and she was nuts.

i would have remembered dinner, think it must have been like any other day.

which is shit loads better than most on here - i'd rather not remember anything special than remeber parents at eat other.

the worst one i can remember is 3 kids under 5 - skint - like bones of arse

no xmas dinner. no gas
freezing

prezzies one tedy from a charity shop each.

woooooooe is me.

Blu, christmas 2, sounded like a rewrite of a lampoons christmas, sorry not nice for you, but very funny for me.

Oh, don't get me started on Compulsory Jolly Board Games . That was an annual low point. With the inevitable rows. And my mum smiling hopefully in the background with yet more mince pies.

I appreciate it sounds Oddly Bitter to those who had different experiences, but people who like their families really don't get how awful and depressing a family can be, while conforming outwardly to the model family image.

God Xmas can be grim can't it?
Its the pressure of having a fabulous time (whether you feel like it or not) and the bloody marterdome!

And the relatives. Don't forget the relatives.

Blu, the vision of the damp pants will haunt me forever!

I'd forgotton about this till just now, but when dcs were 4 & 2, dh fell down stairs doing his santa thing in the dark on Xmas Eve, twisting his ankle.

Spent Xmas day in A&E waiting for it to be XRayed. No food, no vending machines, got home in the evening& went to bed, having decided to act as if Xmas just hadn't happened, and did the whole Xmas thing on boxing day instead.

Sodding ankle wasn't even broken

I went to stay in a remote welsh cottage for xmas with my boyfriend at the time. It was meant to be a romantic getaway but it was so bloody cold and miseerable - not snowy and sparkly, just wet and grey, and the cottage was damp and pongy. We inevitably had a row, because he wanted to phone his parents on xmas day from the payphone but insisted they phone him back to make it cheaper (this was a 28yo with a well paid job) and I was furious with him for being such a tightarse. We spent as much time as possible in bed, not shagging as we were in a foul mood, just trying to keep warm, but the bedclothes were damp too.

To top it all, in about march I discovered the cheque I'd written to pay for the cottage, enclosed in a lovely card I'd chosen, still in my twattish boyfriend's coat pocket as he'd promised to post it and forgotten. The owner, a lovely old lady friend of my aunt, had been too nice to say anything.

God I'm so glad he's history... that xmas summed it up really

My Grandmother who lived in Germany died on Christmas Eve when I was 7. But my lovely Mum didn't tell us until after Christmas as she didn't want to ruin it for us, can't imagine how she felt.

DD's first Christmas was one I don't want to repeat. We'd all gone down with some winter vomiting bug on Christmas Eve and the emergency doctor thought we sounded so bad on the phone that he popped in at 5am Christmas morning as he was "just passing". It took until New Years Eve (which happened to be the Millenium) before we could face eating the turkey.