My hair is growing back after chemotherapy and people keep saying 'oh, you've had all your hair chopped off.' I thought I would be self-conscious in replying 'actually, what you saw before was a wig. I had chemotherapy and my hair fell out - now it's growing back again'. But I actually feel fine about it. I realised that I see my cancer treatment as a badge of honour - one of life's battles I've tackled as best I could.
And it isn't the only one. I've also tackled a childhood with an alcoholic mother, an abusive relationship, single motherhood with debt, an unusual and shocking custody battle for my children, and the loss of both my daughters to their unfit father (one came back).
Reading threads on mumsnet I come across this sort of thing every day - but not everyone views these things the way I see them. Some see themselves as victims or are ashamed of things that are not their fault. They feel unlikeable, unloveable.
I see women who are not blank sheets of paper, but have many interesting things written on them, women who are wiser and stronger because of their sufferings and have much to offer others with their insight and experience.
Please post here and talk about your badges of honour and how wearing them has made you the strong, experienced, multi-layered person you are today.