How do we get rid of the Dummy?

[Enchanted]

My ds 2.5 loves his dummy and seems to love it more as he gets older. Before we moved house in September he was quite happy to hand it over each morning and only get it back for sleep. He had a hard time moving house and he seemed desperate for it all the time which we went along with. Now he walks around with as many as he can carry and seldom puts them down although he dosen't have them outside the house or at playgroup.
The other day when I was building the fire he said something about putting the dummies on it. I ran and got dh and we had a long conversation about saying goodbye to the dummies and that this was a very special day and what a big boy he was. Anyway, I put them on one at a time as he volunteered them and all was well until they started burning, he was in bits. My dummies, my dummies! I don't think he understood that they would be distroyed, he cried for such a long time, holding on tightly to the surviving dummies.
What and when sould I do?

If the baby is happier using the dummy for certain things, ie doesn't have in her mouth all of the time, and you're not disturbed by it, then IMO why go through the potential trauma of getting rid of it? It depends I suppose on whether you're bothered by the image of a toddler or young child still dependant on their dummy. Noone seems to get upset about a child being dependant on a teddy or muslin for sleeping, so why should a dummy be any different? It's also probably easier to wean an older child off a dummy than persuade them to give up sucking their thumb, which is a habit that's looked upon badly in older children.

have just recently weaned my toddler of dummy aged 3. i began to realise we relied on the dummy just as much as he did as we didn't want to face interrupted nights sleep.
we bought him a little present (a tiny keyring torch which we put under his pillow) told him we couldn't find his dummy but to look under the pillow as there was something else there for him, it may have not got him to sleep very quickly but it distracted him enough for him to stay in bed and he hasn't asked for his dummy since. hope this helps.

Sorry if I'm repeating anyone (or even myself!) as haven't read whole thread ...

I got rid of ds's dummy when he was 3 and a half. I let his dummies get really old and dried up until one got a hole in and then disintegrated. He went right off it. I then sabotaged all the others with scissors so that he didn't like them either! (I felt a bit guilty!) He adjusted very quickly and only asked for a dummy a couple of times. He still has a comforter, an old T shirt.

i was sick adn tired of retrieving the dreaded dummy during the night and following a visit to a friend who had just kicked the habit decided on the spur of the moment to do the same and threw all the dummies in teh bin. With a little intrepidation i put DD (14 months old) into bed and employed the cold turkey method - just left her to it.(dummies were only used for sleeping). It probably took more effort from me to stop myself going in. she screamed for 40 mins the 1st night then slept all night. 20 mins the second night with one wake for a quick hello - no screaming. them 2 minutes the 3rd night. I couldn't believe it had been so easy and wished i had done it earlier. Since the dummies went she no longer has a snotty nose/cough/cold all the time and although this may not be linked was certainly a big coincidence!

Thank you ladies and gents for the enlightening information, we have a nearly 3 ds, and we are going to put him in a big boys bed, instead of cot bed, after his 3rd b/day, and the agreement was he loses the dummy soon after, we couldn't tink of how, he only has it for bed, and willingly gives it up, in fact puts it in the sink himself when we get up. But a big THANKS to all for your info I'll try it.

Ronniebaby - I don't mean to be interfering, but you may want to consider getting rid of the dummies before moving him out of the cot. He may get upset enough to leave the bed, and that coul lead into a whole new set of problems. But I'm not an authority, and I don't know your boy.

Cheers boyandgirl, it's DH, I wanted to move bed and leave the dummy as DS only has it in bed, but NO DH says its got to go, even the mother outlaw says leave him he's not even 3 yet, but NO DH knows best

When I was weaning my Daughter age 3 off her dummy we told her that father christmas had sent a letter saying that they had some new baby reindeer that needed some dummys as they were keeping santa awake and he couldn't deliver the presents, we left the dummys (all 5!) on the mantlepeice along with the cookies and milk on Christmas eve and she spent her first night without her dummy looking forward to getting her presents and not worrying about the lack of her "dodie", we even bough her a little present from the reindeer to thank her for the dummies she had given, we never had a problem since. I hope this helps anyone although it is a while till christmas, but this can be used near easter or halloween or what have you.

Cheers Mangar, altho xmas might be a little later than DH wants to wait.

Hope somebody is still checking this thread... DS is almost 5m and has started to refuse the dummy during the day, however, he needs it to go to sleep and we need to "re-insert" it several times between 5 and 7 am. I think he is more fond of his thumb than of his dummy and I would like to get rid of the dummy, but as he has eczema we can not allow him to sleep without his gloves. Does any body has any suggestion about how to introduce a different comforter? The easiest thing would be just to keep as we are but I believe ds really needs to have a good sleep and the dummy is not specially helping at early hours...

Noia - have a look at what I posted earlier in this thread, about how we got rid of our dd's dummy. I don't know much about excema, but could you cut a hole in one mitten to let his thumb out? People tend to scratch with their fingers not their thumbs, I think.

You can't really predict what thing a child will fall in love with, or even whether they will have a comforter at all. I suppose just provide them with a choice of things you feel would be suitable, and make sure they are always available at sleep and comforting times.

Great idea!!! I will try it today, just hope he doesn't learn to use his thumb as well, . (he has already managed to scratch his legs with his toes!!!!)

I'm looking for advice here please....

dd is 19 months and uses a dummy mainly for sleeping. Her nursery is instructed only to give it to her at nap time but on occasion do so when she is very stressed or upset. Also we might give it on long car journeys. But 90% of the time it's for naps and sleep.

anyhow - I an itching to get rid of it and inspired by stories of kids who didn't really miss it. I am thinking of going 'cold turkey' on Friday and 'losing' it and seeing what happens. I thought I would get her to put the dummies in a container and when she goes to get them later at bed time they would be 'gone'.

Do you think this is too harsh on her/too sudden and she will become more anxious because of it? Or should I go ahead and try...?
She often wakes at night and settes easily when we go in and cuddle and give her the dummy - I have visions of wailing the whole night through if she has no dummy. Am I mad to try.....
btw she has a comforter and fav teddy for sleeping too.

why do you want to give it up ?

mainly because she is getting older and I figure the sooner the better. I think at this age she doesn't 'need' it quite so much and it's mostly habit. Does this make sense. She is too young to do the reasoning/rewards stuff. But my main concern is she too young to go cold turkey and take it from her....will it 'harm' her - make her more anxious etc.

well, it depends on your child. If she's only using it for sleep I would tend to stay with it unless she's waking a lot (my ds puts his own dummy back in the night and sleeps very well). It might be very important to her emotionally, or it might not.

BTW I would probably talk about it with her if she's got enough language to speak/understand. But you know your dd better than me.

well, it depends on your child. If she's only using it for sleep I would tend to stay with it unless she's waking a lot (my ds puts his own dummy back in the night and sleeps very well). It might be very important to her emotionally, or it might not.