right am putting this in other subjects to catch out all the awkward buggers who probably hide the behaviour bit
has taken me over 24 hours to be able to post this because I am so bloody mortified at my lack of control over her. this could be long and garbled
DD (4 in Dec) has always been spirited but is also underneath it a sweet & quite thoughtful girl. But the last couple of months - bloody hell. She goes through periods of bolting but I thought she was OK again.
however, in the last week or so she has entered a period of unprecedented hideousity. (well, her sleep has been buggered for the the last few weeks, she wouldn't go to bed until I came home from rehearsals/cocnerts - think she was worrying I wouldn't come back0. Now am having trouble getting her into bed even when I am here (have managed tonight after a battle). For the last week, she has mostly been just weeing and pooing in her pants. We are now trying to matter of fact about it and not give her attention but it is GETTING ME DOWN
the other day she ran out of the driveway and into a garden 4 doors down, which was bad enough. I kind of thought she would bolt along the pavement but knew not to go into the road. BUt yesterday, we went for a lovely walk, until she decided she was afraid of a butterfly and ran right over our road. COmpletely ignoring me (as usual) yelling stop. and not stopping until I caught up with her. I was furious and upset, but decided to carry on with my weekend thing of spending time just with her, so we went to playground. She wouldn't leave with me, so I was waiting at the gate. suddenly she pegged it towards the other gate, let herself out (a supposedly semi-childproof latch) and then ran straight out into the busy road, in front of cars, ignoring me, cars had to stop, she ran out from in front of a parked car. AS bad as it can be really. I had a complete panic attack once I'd got her into the car.
She just doesn't seem to get it. It's been explained to her. Earlier in the day, she told me not to stand in the road as 'I might get hurt'. SHe doesn't listen to a bloody word I say. So it's back on the sodding lead for her because I can't trust her, even a little bit, and I don't know when I ever will be able to
we think the last weeks bad behaviour is probably down to DS (nearly 17 months) finally starting to walk, maybe she feels threatened. And maybe the last few weeks down to me having been ill a lot of the time - I wonder if I've worried her.
What I want really, is your ideas. We've done sitting in the corner etc. I don't think she cares. I've done screaming (I know I shouldn't but I am at the end of my tether) and TBH she doesn't care. I've tried taking stuff away - I'm not sure she makes the connection. I vaguely looked at some star charts today but again, I don't know if it will get through.
I feel like the world's shittest mother TBH. To let your child run over a main road - I'm in tears again writing about it. I am finding her so, so difficult. And it's me, and close family members, she's hell for. SHe's an angel at preschool (3 days a week). I suspect it's all for attention but how do you strike a balance between ignoring it & imposing some discipline. And I have spent so much time making sure she doesn't feel left out and we do lots of stuff just for her, and I'm not really sure why I bother now.
this is really long, I'm sorry, but actually I'm in despair and I don't know how to get her to listen to me, even just a little bit.