Can you please explain to me why people are so judgemental about supposedly voluntary activities?

[AMumInScotland]

Involvement with the PTA is optional, yes?
Attending events organised by the PTA is also optional, yes?

So why are some parents so judgemental about other parents who do not choose to do something which is completely voluntary and optional?

Policy, tis sad but true. Both DH and I are CRB checked, gainfully employed pillars of the community and every single time we have offered our assistance to the PTA it has been ignored. We are fine when it comes to offering football coaching to their children or sitting on residents association or getting a local businessman to agree to volunteer on the school board, but can we accompany children on gala day or help out on a stall, no response.

Blimey Katie. We'd bite your hands off. Fair enough, they do sound rude.

Our PTA is pretty good too, half are very friendly, welcoming, the other half are miserable not.
Sometimes you just have to ignore it to do what you think is right.

I agree with what has been said further up - not judgemental of those who can't help, but I get severely narked off by those who complain.

At our Summer Fair, we had to have less stalls, as we never have enough people to run them. We sent out 5 letters (1 a week) asking - very nicely- if people could help out.

Then at the Fair, we heard alot of "ohhh, there's not as many stalls as there normally is" said in a whiny complaining voice.

The thing is, those of us on the PTA (at our school anyways) are the ones planning the events, we are the ones working the stalls, we are the ones who give more than one lucky dip prize/ requested donations/ whatever because we KNOW no-one else bloody does.

Ok, now I am getting riled!!

We don't do it for the glory - most on our PTA have full time jobs, run businesses whatever. WE ARE ALL BUSY!!

I seriously don't understand how people can take the benefits that the PTA often provide, but contribute nothing - in our school there are alot of those. I wouldn't mind if they support in some small way, but to do/ give nothing all round is taking advantage.

ahhhhhhhhh

but i gbet you would judge if they wore a suit to your bake sale?!

OMG, Custy, that's it. A lightbulb has just gone off! I wore a suit to drop off and pick up, that's why they had me down as an undesireable!!!

Feck em.

But it's voluntary - so why should they be judged for not contributing?????

Some people give blood - but we don't restrict blood transfusions to people who have contributed in a voluntary capacity to the NHS.

The activities are voluntary (A Mum..) BUT, we HAVE to raise funds to provide, sometimes - the basics for the children. Like school books, craft materials, etc

Schools are affected by the rising costs as well. They get one lump of money - the electric bill still has to be paid. Everything goes up, but the school doesn't always get proportionately more money to compensate.

More and more the schools CANT pay for the things that "colour" your child's school experience - like playground equipment etc.

I DO find it very satisfying to see the kids having a blast on something we have bought, or have swimming lessons that they may not have.

Message withdrawn

It's just the judging that really gets me. We all have committments (sp?). We all have strengths and weaknesses. We all reach a limit of what we feel able to contribute (some before they contribute anything).

I have every respect for the people who do these things (and I've often been one of them myself) but I just don't see why people who for whatever reason don't contribute to these events have to be judged and moaned at.

Moaning about vegan cakes etc. is daft, but timing moans are a serious issue. If meetings and events are in work-time then that will exclude parents who work. This wouldn't change if someone who worked joined the PTA and pointed this out, because they'd be fighting against the culture. To be fair, our PFA has evening meetings, but events are nearly always straight after school.

Totally echo edoodlre2's first(or onl) post

am on pa as have time now, didnt last year so wasnt

fair play

but the old pa chair walked after some really horrendous threats because they didnt do everything the parents wanted (due to a bad pa year chair was doing it alone so doing anything was an achievement)

now that pee'd me off

our pa (yup even the teachers arent helping) is daytime but thats because i can only do days (dh on nights). If someone else had taken on secretary-ship who could make evenings then it could have worked that way but nobody else wanted it.

and people think we're being exclusive meeting in the day but we're not,and would explain if anybody asked.