Would you do something you have always wanted to do if it meant leaving ALL your possessions behind?

[beansmum]

We (me and ds) are moving to NZ early next year and I can't afford to ship anything over apart from one box of toys and books for ds. I have been feeling really miserable about leaving all my stuff, tons of books, my new at xmas sofa, all my plates that I have collected one at a time over years and years...

I know it is just things that can be replaced but I'm starting to wonder (just a tiny bit, I'm definitely still going) if I'm doing the right thing. Will I regret leaving stuff behind?

I would probably have to take a very small box of stuff with me, mainly photos, jewellery and a couple of small items but not really anything else.

Can you not get someone to store your smaller stuff and get bits shipped over bit by bit once you are over there?

Can you keep some of it at a friend's or relative's house until you can afford to ship it? Some of the smaller items, at least.

Can you leave more stuff in storage & get someone to help ship more out later when finances aren't as tight? Or could anyone store stuff for you?
Surely you're going to loose lots of sentimental stuff ....

lots of different thoughts on this over on this hread from earlier in the week

Is there no way at all you can get the stuff out to NZ? Could it be left with someone in the UK until you can afford to ship it over? Maybe you could sell a few less important bits to fund shipping things you'll really miss? Sorry don't mean to fire questions at you but seems a shame to leave everything behind if there's any way round it.

I am a little confused at how, if you can't afford to ship your belongings, you can afford to replace them? Is it that you expect to earn a lot more money in your new home, or are you moving into a fully-furnished house? But what I would suggest is: do you have any friends/family with loft space who could store things like your plate collection and favourite books? Because if you are going to have more money once you get there, you can have your stuff shipped in stages. Or are any friends or family likely to ask what you want for leaving present, in which case you can ask for either storage space or a contribution towards shipping costs.
FWIW I am always suspicious of people who claim not to care about possessions and criticize other people for having favourite objects. It usually means they are careless, thoughtless, self-righteous and light-fingered, so don't let anyone preach to you, your reluctance to abandon treasured items (such as a collection, and your books) is perfectly understandable.

Can you just think of it as a new start? We left everything behind when we moved, and I found it really refreshing, a real lightening of the load, after the initial pangs.

I will have to buy everything new, but it'll be cheaper as a lot of things (1000's of books, fancy crockery) aren't essential and I can just buy the cheapest of everything else. And I have money over there in a fixed term investment which doesn't come to the end of its term until the week I arrive. It isn't loads, just enough for all the letting fees, deposit for a flat, basic furniture and the first months food, bills etc. I will be a student on a very tight budget so even if I store some things over here, and my parents have offered to store some for me, I wont be able to get it shipped over for ages.

'FWIW I am always suspicious of people who claim not to care about possessions and criticize other people for having favourite objects. It usually means they are careless, thoughtless, self-righteous and light-fingered'

bit of a generalisation?

I would worry about photos, old family videos, DS's first pictures etc. Basically stuff of sentimental value. I would worry less about new sofas. Are you taking all that sort of stuff? If not can you leave it somewhere safe and take it over in dribs and drabs when you come back and visit or friends come out to visit you?

Most of the stuff you mention is functional - books are personal as are collections so I would be sad if i could not take them but I would be looking at the bigger picture of what you are gaining by making the move..

Is the move worth the loss of the books and plates? Can these collections be replaced?

I am not overly attached to stuff and so hugely disagreed with madamez (for first time ever!) as I am not careless etc but put more emphasis on quality of life, memories, the future, etc -- I would be looking to those "things" to balance out the loss of the physical stuff

i think i could do this if it meant persuing a dream. Books and crockery arent really important - flog them. Just keep the things that you really really love and that are small! You are taking your most important thing with you - ds - and kids are your memories, your present and your futur eall wrapped up in a convenient bundle that gets its own plane seat. the very best of luck to you

pursuing sorry

I don't really have that many photos and sentimental stuff, I hardly ever take photos of ds, and I'll have him with me anyway! I will probably fit a folder of ds's pictures and first hand prints etc into my suitcase, other than that my parents are going to send over one small box of stuff as a Christmas present. Mostly my handmade xmas decorations, but some other stuff too.

I think I will ask my parents to store all my books even if I can't get them shipped out for a while. I have collected them all from second hand shops over about 15 years, some were actually shipped out to nz and then back again! I think I'll give my plates to my sister, then I can check up on them and make sure they are being looked after!

Just a thought but would selling some of those things (thinking of the new sofa really) help cover shipping costs for other things? Maybe also electrical equipment? There are pawn shops and places that would give you a bit for that kind of stuff. It might not be much but it might cover some of the sentimental stuff on a slow passage.

possibly...tbh I hadn't really thought about what I am going to do with all this stuff I'm not taking with me! I don't want some stranger sitting on my lovely sofa though! Maybe I'll sell everything my parents aren't storing and take the sofa with me.

You're very attached to that sofa aren't you Was it something you wanted for ages before you were able to get it? It will be much more expensive to ship than books and plates, just because of the size.

I have wanted it for years and years and years! My lovely grandfather left me some money (he died last summer) and it was in the sale and I could finally afford it.

Ah, I get it, so the sofa actually has more sentimental value than lots of the smaller things, because of the history.

to clarify: people who lecture other people about how unimportant possessions are, tend to be the people who 'borrow' or break other people's stuff and then start whining about how unimportant possessions are.