Need to decide wether to go to friends surprise birthday party or not

[IllegallyBrunette]

She is going to be 40, and her hubby has arranged a party/meal in a local resturant, for about 20 people.

I wasn't sure wether i'd be asked to go as although I am friends with the birthday girl, I don't know any of her other friends as they are all friends of theirs that they grew up with and go out with as couples.

I have only met two of her friends before, one was lovely but the other was a bit standoffish.

They are all quite posh, well off people and I will have absolutly nothing in commen with any of them at all.

The meal will cost £25 minimum and thats without taxis. Plus on the same afternoon I am taking my dd's to a theatre show, and so will have to rush back to be ready in time.

I will feel awful not going, but I know I will feel like such a fish out of water and plus I can't really afford it.

So, do I just grin and bare it and go, or not go but ofer to take my friend out to lunch as soon as she is free ?

If it's a sit down meal you'll be fine! Mingling can be hard when you're on your own I know. But go for the meal and you can surely chat to somebody!?

It is a sit down meal yes, but as for what i'd chat about, I have no clue.

They all have good jobs, big houses, nice holidays etc etc. I am a single non working mum, living in a HA house and my last holiday was at Butlins.

No way?! I'd love to go out to dinner with you! We;d have loads to talk about. Do you like green olives or black olives? I only like the black ones, so I could leave you all the green ones.

I'm a single SAHm too and I know exactly how you feel. I have some very successful happily married friends, who individually are all very kind to me, but I know they pity me, and feel my life needs to be fixed so it can be more like theirs. SOmetimes I feel like standing up and saying "but I'm ok! don't put your heads to one side and look at me with pity! Money is not my God". (well, ok maybe somedays it is a Goddess, but I'm not going to tell them that!.)

I've changed my mind now that I can put myself in to your shoes. Fekk them. STay at home and watch Eastenders with a bottle of lidl wine and tell your friend you couldn't afford it. MILK it. We can always get away with that one!

LOL GreenElizabeth, i'd much prefer to eat out with you, you sound like you are on my wavelength.

I think I am going to say I can't make it and then take my mate out for lunch somewhere another day.