I'm up for a chuckle or two. Please supply your wedding poems asking for money.

[MARGOsBeenPlayingWithMyNooNoo]

'cos I searched the archive and I can't find the thread.

Right, I'll start with one I've made up (It won't be very good)

Ahem.

Tony and I are setting the date,
It's been such a long old wait.
For him to ask "will you be my wife"
It will be the happiest day of my life.

'cos you'll turn up with bags of cash
Which we'll spend on cheap old trash
We won't bother writing to you
As that's just not what we do.

Anyway, I'm sure you can do much better than me.

Ah - you're in awe of my rhyming skills

BUMP!

okay, here's another.

I have the spending habits of Mrs Posh
So come to our wedding and give us yer dosh!

This invites you to witness
(Name and Name) say ''I Do''
If you wish to give something
Here's a clue for you

Be it kettle or toaster,
They do have the lot
So rather than give them
Something they've got...

Larger items are needed
And on these they must spend
So cash is appreciated,
Hope this doesn't offend

found this on a wedding site

We'd love you to come to our wedding
We look forward to seeing you there.
But please could you do us a favour?
And show us you really do care.
We have all the toasters we needed
And kettles are easy to find
Bed linen we have in abundance
And clocks that we don't have to wind
The glasses we have are quite lovely
And the cutlery still has it's shine
The ornaments all have their places
And the furniture all looks just fine.
The white ware is even still gleaming
The microwave cooks up a treat
The washer is still quite effective
And the iron still keeps our clothes neat.
So if you'd like to give us a present
Save a trip to the shops or the net
It's the money we'd rather be getting
And its easier to wrap it, we bet.
So please come help join us together
Help celebrate our special day
But please don't come loaded with boxes
They would only get in our way!

_

Unsure in our minds, of what we may need,
Not wanting to offend, or show any greed,
We have the essentials to be living in sin,
A kettle, a toaster, and even a bin.
So , vouchers are requested, in order to proceed,
With the purchases that we, will eventually need.

_

Don't worry about gifts, don't buy us a yacht,
The things that we need, we've already got.
Our home is quite compact, we may have to move
Then our storage and space will surely improve.

Don't go out shopping or get yourself stressed,
Don't alter your plans for a pre wedding rest.
If you want to be generous, despite what we've said,
Then save all the hassle and do this instead.....

Don't know how to word this but will give it our best shot..
Contributions are most welcome, we'll go somewhere hot!
A honeymoon would be marvellous, to start off our life,
In our long winding journey, as new husband and wife!
Thank you

Thankyou Bubblagirl!

tried to write my own they were naff lol

so are mine

I can't really be bothered with a list
And I am paying for you to get pissed
I know that you won't give us much
Its not as though we've kept in touch

And you really do have awful taste
So any present would be a waste
I have never liked the things you buy
And just this once don't want to try

So lets abandon all pretence
Come on, you know that it makes sense
Please don't give us lots of trash
What we want is hard earned cash

do people really put these on invites

you can come to my wwedding and have free nosh

if instead of presents you give us your dosh

my poor efforts

That's the one Goosey! I lurve that one!

Message withdrawn

Message withdrawn

I know I know! Do you know any?

I had one of these last year. Funnily enough I did not take cash.There is now a website called HoneyMoney _ I only know this cos a card suggesting we might like to contribute to said fund arrived in a wedding invite recently. I am not doing this - we can only afford to camp this year - no way am I sending someone esle to Mauritius!

I hate this thing of a card with wedding list etc fluttering out of your invite. Either I am invited purely for the pleasure of having my dear face at your do or I am not. I am not invited conditional on a purchase from Joh Lewis.

We have our dishes and towels for two,
We have our pots and pans and oven mitts too.
So what do you get for the bride and groom
Whose house is set up in every room?
If you would like to give us a Wedding Gift,
Contributions to our honeymoon would give us a lift.
But more important we would like to say
Is your presence on our Wedding Day.

Got this last week. Normally lurk, but thought it was too vomit inducing to keep to myself.

Percent, I thought that one was quite nice, not disgustingly grasping like most of them..

Good God, are these things for real? I just made mine up for a laugh.

I hate these polite begging letters poems in with the invitations.

If I receive an invitation and would like to buy a present I will either use my discretion or ask the bride.

Has anyone else noticed that you never get a thank you (verbal, written or otherwise) once you have given them a wad of your hard earned case? Perhaps they never received it, perhaps a greedy relative stole it, perhaps they thought you didn't give enough.

Who knows, whatever the reason, they don't want to bother saying thanks.

(rant over!)

Various responses suggested on this thread...

surely theses aren't really in invitations??

these

pmsl goosey!