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School mums

16 replies

Onelonelymum · 24/09/2025 05:43

So there's a group of mums at school. All our kids hang out and are best friends. All the mums hang out at the gates and during the weekend and holidays. I get on quite well with two of them but one of the mums has made it quite clear that she doesn't like me. This is fine with me, I get that not everyone likes each other, but she is making it very hard for me to get along with the others now. I get left out of stuff that's organized and ignored at school. I try to go over and talk to the group and make an effort but the atmosphere isn't great when she is there. At an after school activity we attend she was texting one of the other parents about us being there. When we have been in a group she will purposely plan stuff with all the other mums and make it clear in front of me and my boy that we are not invited. I'm worried that my boy will end up being left out to. It's got to the point where my anxiety around school pick up and drop off is huge. I have no friends where we live and I just want to get along with people, I'm not one for drama.

OP posts:
Silvertulips · 24/09/2025 05:46

Then step away!

There are other mums to chat with at the school gates.

Don’t put so much effort into this group.

Stay pleasant.

Once i walked away from a similar situation, I found true friends.

Rumbletumbley · 24/09/2025 06:15

You could plan stuff?

invite her though. No need to play tit for tat

Onelonelymum · 24/09/2025 06:21

I have organized play dates in the park and always included everyone and she always comes along. I'm just unsure how to go forward as I don't want one woman's dislike for me affect my kids friendships.

OP posts:
funrunsunday · 24/09/2025 06:23

I wouldn't even entertain trying. Just step away. Nothing and I mean nothing you do can change this. Return the same energy, speak to new people.

Your child can still play at school and may even make a different group of friends over time.

Rumbletumbley · 24/09/2025 08:18

Onelonelymum · 24/09/2025 06:21

I have organized play dates in the park and always included everyone and she always comes along. I'm just unsure how to go forward as I don't want one woman's dislike for me affect my kids friendships.

The other members of the group leave you out and ignore you?

Onelonelymum · 24/09/2025 09:20

They will ignore me when she is there, if she is not then they are fine

OP posts:
User37482 · 24/09/2025 09:22

I don’t like the sound of the group tbh, I wouldn’t ignore anyone regardless of how one person was behaving. I wish people would just grow up, this is just unbecoming in grown women. The problem os people mix up their friendships with their children's friendships so much, unless you are a complete psychopath who’s nailed cats to peoples doors I will speak to you if my child likes yours.

DinaofCloud9 · 24/09/2025 09:24

She sounds awful. Have you any idea why she's being like this?

Rumbletumbley · 24/09/2025 10:30

Onelonelymum · 24/09/2025 09:20

They will ignore me when she is there, if she is not then they are fine

So op she’s not the only one to blame

it sounds like the entire group is one to dodge

Onelonelymum · 24/09/2025 11:20

No not really, I have always tried to be friendly with her, but from day one she has always been a bit stand offish, I don't really understand she seems to get on really well with others. I just seem to get avoided or the occasional sarcastic comment. The sad thing is I hear we have a lot of stuff in common 🤷🏻‍♂️

OP posts:
ComfortFoodCafe · 24/09/2025 12:06

If the others ignore you when shes there - they arent your friends.

Rumbletumbley · 24/09/2025 12:34

ComfortFoodCafe · 24/09/2025 12:06

If the others ignore you when shes there - they arent your friends.

Exactly

OP you have zero idea where this could have possibly come from. Is there not anyone on the group that you could meet for a coffee and a chat about it?

PollyBell · 24/09/2025 12:36

Does anyone have jobs they can focus on to keep people away from this Coronation Street drama's?

Rumbletumbley · 24/09/2025 12:37

PollyBell · 24/09/2025 12:36

Does anyone have jobs they can focus on to keep people away from this Coronation Street drama's?

Oh they’d find the time!

awakeandasleep · 24/09/2025 13:18

There is always one mum like this in every year. They are the queen bee and you are either seen as weak or a threat. I have spent nearly 20 years doing the school run and the best you can do is to be pleasant and do not invest any head space to this - it is a psychological/ sociological minefield.

It could all be in your own head too so you are giving off anxious vibes or more likely people are just chatting to the people they feel most comfortable with. Good luck.

Onelonelymum · 24/09/2025 17:33

Yes I have a job, nothing wrong with asking for others opinions!

OP posts:
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