Scared of Dark !!

[ANGELMOTHER]

Am new here so be patient but main prblem is 3yr old won't let us turn light off at night at all. We've tried dimming it gradually but she always kicks up a fuss. Also sooner or later ends up in our bed....I know their bed v our bed is a hot topic, personally it doesn't bother us but as exception rather than rule. I feel as though we have somehow got into some bad habits here but not sure how to break them......HELP

Will she go to sleep if the landing light is left on and her door open. I always put my children back into bed if they get up otherwise they get into a bad habit of expecting to come in your room everytime they do otherwise. Be kind but firm and she will get the message.

You're right Temptress I do have to be more firm but such an objection is put up, and then there's monsters esp Gruffalos that I give in leave the light on and turn it off with landing light on when she's asleep but then inevitably she wakes again.....Aaargh

What about a small lamp in here room with a nightlight in it? Gruffalos...what video has she been watching...lol! Cuddly her up to her favourite teddy and tell her that he will look after her. You can get books from the library to read to toddlers who are scared of monsters but cant remember the titles of any at the moment!

My 5 year old still sleeps with a lamp on. He stays asleep all night and it means there is a light on for him in the morning

my 3 year old has justed started wanting his light on at night, we leave his door open and the passage light on and seems a lot better since he got a big spud for christmas (bob the builder) and he looks after him, i turn the light on and shut his door when i go to bed, he is fine till the morning. hope she gets over this soon, i know how it can be after a hard day you just want to sit down and put your feet up.

I'd leave the light on or buy her a special 'magic' nightlight to comfort her. I still can't sleep in total darkness - it makes me feel claustrophobic. The Gruffalo is a fantastic book - my ds loves it, but I can see how it might feed a few scary dreams!

She has a small lamp which I leave left on but will change to nightlight soon, have avoided Gruffalo stories before bed but am due to go to "Gruffalo Show" on Thursday...... that will be one night without sleep. Mother bought tickets and DD really looking forward to it butstill not sure.........

Angelmother, don't worry, you'll both love the Gruffalo show. And remind dd that the Gruffalo is a daft monster who is very easily fooled by someone much smaller than him! Better not let her see Where the Wild Things Are.
Being scared of the dark and ending up in bed with you are two separate issues in that we have a ds who is not at all scared of the dark but likes to cosy up in the small hours. I am told children outgrow both in time.

Not sure who's looking forward to it more me or her I get into city aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh the bright lights.

BTW I don't think having the light on is a bad habit at all - I also don't think it is related to getting into your bed. Have fun with the Gruffalo (don't you know, there's no such thing as a Gruffal - Oh!)

Angelmother, my 3 yr old recently became "worried about the dark" but we leave a lamp on in his room with a night light in it all night which seems to help. When he goes to bed I also leave the landing light on until we go up to bed ourselves. Has sometimes wakes at 4.00/5.00 am wanting to come to our bed but we just sit him down and explain he has to stay where he is which he accepts!!!! Sometimes we will turn the landing light on for a while until he drops back to sleep. The night light is definately a good idea.

ANGELMOTHER - I have a 25 mo old who has been in and out of our bed for a while. My mom always said dont start something you want to have a problem with later. She was right. Moms always know best (most of the time, but not always). I used to put him to sleep occasionally for naps in our bed and now its ended up all the time. Now its gotten to where I have to start him off in our bed to get him to sleep. Then I move him to his bed. Then in the middle of the night he gets up when I'm in a deep sleep and just quietly climbs in our bed over us. I'm too tired to get up and move him so I leave him there rather then make a fuss and have him crying at 3:00 in the morning. I dont know what I'm going to do.

Now he started a new phase along with the sleeping in our bed phase. I think he has become horrified of the dark. The past 3 nights we put him to bed his normal time and the minute we leave the room he comes out screaming hesterical even before hes out of the bed. It's like hes having a panic attack. I really think he has become aware of being alone in the dark. We did try a nightlight but it didnt work. I guess well have to keep trying.

I think if you would rather not have your child in your bed for whatever reason the best way to handle it would be to just keep putting them back in their bed even if it takes many times a night. A week or two of this straight without giving in may work. Most on the site dont beleive in spanking but I will spank if nothing else works as far as discipling. This does work for him personally. Hell tempt me over and over until I give him a spanking then he realizes I mean business and he settles down.