Moving away with Child

[newmummylucy]

Hello - I have posted on this issue before but am seeking more advice on the subject as I am scared I will get in trouble for just moving

I am going through divorce with husband and we are currently situated in a very expensive area of London in his home he had prior to our relationship. He has moved out and living elsewhere (I dont know where) and we currently cant release any money from the property to go towards dividing assets due to the cladding/EWS1 form issue

My family live 90 miles away and I am being told by husband I must live in either Buckinghamshire (near his family) or surrey - however I am wanting to be around my support network which is in sussex.

Husband has advised he will give me X amount of money a month for CM which is nowhere near enough and is his legal bare minimum and so I will be needing to work a lot more hours than I currently do to afford bills, food, basic living etc...In order to work more hours I feel i need my families support for childcare but my husband has point blank refused me moving and changing our childs school

I cant afford surrey with no support around me and don't feel buckinghamshire is a good option as it will isolate me from my family and means I have to rely on his for support.

My solicitor has advised I go ahead and move where I like as the worst he can do is a prohibited steps order - however this scares me a lot as he has a lot of money to throw at courts and lawyers.

He currently sees our child every other weekend and many times that has resulted in me picking up his weekends and doing 5 weeks in a row etc. He doesnt call our child every night like we had agreed and he does things like booking 2 week holidays without the consideration of seeing our child. I had to go away for a week recently and he called me days before saying he could no longer look after our child so he insisted i had to cancel my trip

He is also seeing our child this weekend but only for the day and has given me a curfew of 8pm to be home and has refered to himself as 'babysitting' our child

In terms of moving 90 miles away I have suggested 50/50 in the holidays which he doesnt want, and have suggested every other weekend and phone calls every night etc which we are meant to be doing now

Thankyou - please be kind. I am just trying to do my best and build a life for my child

Your solicitor is best placed to advise you, so I would follow their advice.

Good luck. (You might want to report your post and ask for it to be moved to Legal Matters.)

You need to record his actual contact and communication for the court order if he’s seeing child once a month for a day your not unreasonable for wanting child to have other people aside from you and his limited contact involved that care about child.
He’s not wanting 50/50 so for his limited contact he might have to drive a while to see child as having other people around who do care is beneficial for his child.
I would start arranging to move near Family and see what happens.
I’m not sure if courts will suggest an amount for child support as part of the divorce but if not use maintenance service for maintenance not ideal but why should child go without.

Your solicitor has advised you to move. Do it, don't tell him, inform him after you have done it. He is not seeing his child as agreed, not keeping in contact, booking holidays without consideration of his weekend with his child and deliberately sabotaging your holiday with refusing to have his child on his agreed weekend. Why would you stay near him? It certainly isn't to facilitate seeing his child because he isn't doing it.

Keep a timeline document of everything that has happened so that if he can be bothered to take this to court you can show that he doesn't have a relationship with his child at present. You need to stop fearing what he may do and start prioritising you and your child.

My friend's ex took them to court and their ex's solicitor had actually written that money was no object, they had millions to spend and they will get their way. They didn't. The court did not look favourably on this attitude as it was not in the best interests of the child and specifically said it doesn't matter how much money you have and it was all rather distasteful.

How am i able to change my childs school without his permisson? Ive read the school wont process the application without his consent?