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Original poster

Does anyone else find this a bit odd?

88 replies

galaxy · 15/01/2005 21:33

ds was 12 today and invited his girlfriend to the pics. She wanted her best friend to go too so we paid for lunch and the pics for the 3 of them.

We weren't expecting him to get presents so were pleasantly surprised when he did.

The friend gave him a "Christian" video together with a pamphlet all about God. Her mum and dad had given it to her to give to him.

He thanked her of course but I think found it very odd. I do too. We were bought up as churchgoers but I wouldn't dream of giving someone I've never met a religious gift.

I know it's not important in the grand scale of things and it as lovely that they wanted to give him a present, but anyone else find it a bit strange or is it just me?

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Original poster
galaxy · 15/01/2005 22:03

TC - what's up? Haven't been around much lately to keep up?

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scaltygirl · 15/01/2005 22:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

ThomCat · 15/01/2005 22:06

Oh nothing that serious mate, just lost my voice beg Dec and was ill, then Mon after NYE got flu and i thought it had gone but I've been kneecapped by it again today, fell hot, headachy, body aches, just feeling sorry for myself.

Original poster
galaxy · 15/01/2005 22:07

sorry to hear that TC. Hope you start to feel better soon.

Am off to bed now myself so goodnight xx

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tallulah · 16/01/2005 11:20

galaxy, I wonder if they are Witnesses? When one of the teachers left our C of E primary, she gave all of her Y5 class a Jehovah's Witness book each (inscribed personally to each child). My DS1 was one of them & came home quite bemused. We all complained to the Head who did agree that it wasn't appropriate.

Original poster
galaxy · 16/01/2005 11:23

I thought Witnesses didn't believe in Jesus though. Also they don't celebrate birthdays (or Christmas) so unlikely they's let her go to a birthday party or buy a card.

He has thrown out the leaflets now - just seen them in the bin.

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janeybops · 16/01/2005 11:36

I would be furious. It is up to you and your family to decide about religious matters!

I would phone the mum and say something - but hey that's just me!

aloha · 16/01/2005 11:39

Very, very strange indeed.

Tinker · 16/01/2005 11:44

I wouldn't be furious just p*ed off at such a crap present. Can he cellotape over the tabs on the video and tape over it?

Some religions do believe they have a duty to prosletyse unfortunately. I'd breath a sigh of relief that your son chucked them in the bin.

Original poster
galaxy · 16/01/2005 11:49

Glad others agree with me and I'm not just being a miserable cow. tbh, I'm not bothered about the fact it was a crap present as we/he wasn't expecting a present anyway - it wasn't a party and he just thought he'd get a card so the nice bit of me says it was kind to think of giving a present. Then the cynical bit kicks in and starts wondering about their ulterior motives.

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Socci · 16/01/2005 12:03

Message withdrawn

nightowl · 16/01/2005 12:04

i dont think that is appropriate as a birthday gift. im not religious in any way. i have nothing against any religion but i dont think its right to shove it in someone's face like that. not the right way to go about it in my opinion.

Tortington · 16/01/2005 22:53

i am catholic and the ones i know arnt god botherers - but there are some sections of christianity as pointed out feel its their duty. i think - they do not know anything about you or your beliefs and you should have wrapped it up sent it back with a note saying " thank you but we already have this one. just a tip but dont give videos away to people if your not sure of their beliefs first. but thanks anyway!"

JulieF · 16/01/2005 23:04

I don't find it that odd. I often receive stuff like this from the people that run the toddler group I go to at our local church. We get children's bible books for Christams and this year got a pamphlet about the meaning of Christmas.

To me it means that someone cares enough about us to think of us.

Caligula · 16/01/2005 23:15

Yes it is odd, but then fundamentalists are. Sorry to any fundamentalists out there, but it's just too late on a Sunday to care if I offend you, I do find fundamentalism more than a little odd.

Reasonably harmless, though, I wouldn't be offended by it. If you're secure and firm in your own beliefs, why would someone else trying to convert you to theirs upset you? After all, it's just a video, they haven't tried to lock your DS up in a room and deprive him of food until he agrees to be baptised. Now that would be offensive.

If it was a Monty Python video or a "Something about Mary" video, you probably wouldn't think anything of it, but to these people, the video they gave your DS is probably exactly the same in their eyes.

Loved your story about the wedding card Scaltygirl, what robust affairs weddings must be in NI

CarrieG · 16/01/2005 23:28

Not odd, but tiresome - but then I'm fairly 'robust' on the subject of Stealth God Bothering...!

singsong · 16/01/2005 23:33

I do find this odd and definitely not something I would give as a present myself even though I do believe in God. I do think though that it might have been given with very good intentions, maybe God and Christianity are really important in their lives and they felt that sharing this would be a good gift. They weren?t necessarily giving it with the intention of ?shoving it down his throat? (although on the other hand it is possible that they were) and maybe their idea was just to give him a one off introduction to the religion. If someone was generally very pushy about the subject and repeatedly raised it then this would annoy me greatly but if they just did a one off/occasional gesture and then left it alone and left me to decide the rest I would not find it a problem.

jabberwocky · 16/01/2005 23:35

I would be very unhappy if someone did this with ds. In fact, I was a little miffed at our neighbor for giving him a children's Bible when she knows we don't attend church but put it behind me to stay on good relations.

ScummyMummy · 17/01/2005 00:04

Would be a bit intrigued and a bit horrified were my sons to receive such a gift! I s'pose it's a kind of compliment if she really wants your son to be saved tho?

Your message of doom sounds perturbing tho, scalty...

Hope you feel better soon TC. All of us have a return bout of flu having thought we'd shaken off a new year dose... It's really shit, isn't it?

tigermoth · 17/01/2005 07:54

I find it odd, too. My sons attend a C of E church school and we attend church sometimes, but there are far more devout parents there than us. Not one of them has ever tried to force me or my sons to be more religious in any way.

phew, three girlfriends since september? wanting to spend his birthday with a girl (even if it's not serious)? my oldest son is just 14 months younger than yours. Is this what I can expect!!

Caligula · 17/01/2005 08:18

Speaking as a raging atheist, I'd be delighted if someone gave my DS a children's bible for a present.

I think it's really important for children to know bible stories. For me, it's nothing to do with religion, any more than the Greek and Roman myths are. It's the bottom line of Western literature and culture, and if kids grow up not knowing anything about the Old and New Testament, then there's an awful lot of literary, artistic and cultural references which are going to completely pass them by.

singsong · 17/01/2005 09:15

Good point Caligula, I never thought of that. I would agree it is important for kids to learn about this stuff even if not to believe in it. Also it could be part of teaching them that everyone has different beliefs and that we should respect the opinions of others whilst at the same time we should be entitled to hold different beliefs ourselves.

Original poster
galaxy · 17/01/2005 10:38

I also agree that it's important for children to understand the reasons behind religion, historical reasons for religious celebrations etc. I still think it's a bizzarre thing to give someone you hardly know. The parents had never met my ds.

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littlemissbossy · 17/01/2005 10:44

Hi Galaxy, I too would find this sort of gift inappropriate, whether you're religious or not. TBH if it were me I'd put in a cupboard until he's forgotten about it, then bin it

Original poster
galaxy · 17/01/2005 10:50

Can't imagine he'll ever watch it. I might!

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