Mums WhatsApp group gone bitchy

[AlexaMoore0206]

Bear with me this is a long one.
Basically my sister and I are so close, so close in fact we are next door neighbours, are kids are all similar ages and we have two kids in the same class at school. When our kids started we were in one big WhatsApp group with all parents from the class, pretty soon there was a splinter group of about 5 mums (my sister and I both included) and we would chat in there and socialise etc and meet up and do stuff.
Recently I’ve learned there’s a further splinter group of 3 and my sister is in there and not me, now usually I wouldn’t care but they’ve been planning some fun outings and outed myself and another mum - I can’t for the life of me think why as we all get on really well and what’s 2 more people. Anyway, it’s really upset me. I’m really lucky as I have many other social groups that I’m in and my sister doesn’t and she’s desperate for these “friends” to be her friends but I can’t help but think that one of these other mums is trying to cause a rift between us (again no idea why) and it’s suddenly turned very sour. I just thought my sister’s loyalty and integrity would be a bit stronger than this - I know I’d never do this to her. If it was three random people I don’t think I’d mind as much, it’s cutting deep because it’s my sister and I would have expected more from her. When I asked her where my invite was to these other things she just says “you don’t have to be invited to everything”…

Not sure what I’m expecting from saying this, am I in the wrong for feeling this way?

but I can’t help but think that one of these other mums is trying to cause a rift between us (again no idea why) and it’s suddenly turned very sour.

Sorry but I see no evidence of this in your post, can you elaborate on why you think this? What exactly has turned sour within the group, or do you just feel sour about it?

Honestly based on what you’ve shared this is really not worth getting worked up about. You have plenty of social outlets, you’re not entitled to be involved in everything. Sometimes 3 people get along/click and they want to socialise together, it doesn’t automatically mean it’s personally directed towards you. Unless you’ve got some other drip feed or points to make I really don’t see any issue OP.

By the way why don’t you include your sister in your many other social groups? If it cuts you so deep to not be involved in one with her, shouldn’t you be involving her in everything you do?

Thanks for your reply. So this other mum insists that her child calls my sister “Auntie” which I also find a bit odd considering we’ve not known them for very long. There’s lots of small undercut things that might not mean much by themselves but together it amounts to a feeling I have.

In regards to my other social outlets those groups were never a mutual friendship group if that makes sense - we were in this group of friends together the other groups of friends I’ve made separately and whilst I’ve tried to include her before she’s always made an excuse as to why she didn’t want to come along

Odd position to adopt OP seeing as you had no issue creating a splinter group of 5, who knows, perhaps you left another Mum then feeling as you do now.

Your sister is entitled to have separate friendships from you, you don't own her and vice versa. You're nose is out of joint because you feel you're being excluded, news flash, that's ok. You are not entitled to be involved in everything.

I'm very close to my sister as are our children and I love her enough to encourage and support her growth, not stunt it.

So as above.. splinter groups you're in.... fine,
Separate friendship groups you have from your sis...fine...
Her having 2 friends in a chat you're not.. NOT FINE?!
Really?!

Outed doesn't mean what you think it means.

And your sister doesn't have to include you in everything. Let her have her own friends

This all sounds like you are back in the school playground wouldn't it be simpler to concentrate on your own friends and stop worrying about what other people are doing, is it a self esteem issue?

But you are quite happy having you own group away from the main group and no doubt made another woman feel the way you do now?

I don’t see any drama or outing going on I just see you being jealous that your sister has been included in something and you somehow feel entitled to question her. Very odd.

are the events they are planning more exciting than yours?

So you are now in a much smaller splinter group of 5 where you have moved from a much bigger group of mums and excluded those mums and you and the other 4 have probably all arranged fun days between yourselves whilst excluding the mums from the bigger group but now you don’t like it because you have found out that there is also another splinter group of 3 who are planning fun days without you? So it’s ok for you to exclude people from your group of 5 but not for other people to do the same? Okay!