This is going to be very long winded, please no horrible comments I'm broken more then I could even imagine.
after months & months of thinking my boyfriend of 13 years was cheating on me, but looked me in the eye daily swearing he hadn't and he wouldn't, eventually I found out 3 weeks ago that yes I was right along not only was he cheating on me he was paying prostitutes he calls them high class escorts but to me they are prostitutes they sell their body. When I found out he swore blind that it was nothing but a chat about mine and his relationship, but I knew deep down he was lying he continued to tell me for days it was just a chat and nothing happened between him and any of them. For my own sake I did an STI test even though he kept telling me I didn't need to take a test because he did nothing with them, which the test came pack positive for Chlymdia,I told him he was obviously lying as how would I have caught it when he's the only person I've ever slept with, he continued to say nothing happened and he doesn't see how I've got it, he then changed the story and told me one of them give him a massage so that must have been how he caught it, still not believing him a few days past and I find out I've had it that long it's spread to my pelvic and I now have a pelvic inflammatory infection. Days later he then changed his story again but before telling me was asking me to swear down we had a future together, then tells me one of them give him a blow job so that's how he caught it. I still do not believe him as he's changed his story so many times. In my heart I believe he's slept with all of them, and when he's saying he regrets it and it's the biggest mistake of his life I can't help but think that's only because I've caught him out. Now that's not the only thing there's a girl in his phone too he's been sneaking around for months with to but won't admit to it either but he's action prove I'm right, texting on his phone but soon as I'm around he's quickly locking his phone and putting it in his pocket. He's telling me all he wants is me and he's sorry but yet still continuing to sneak about on his phone. Not only all this, I was due to have surgery on my stomach last Friday which was cancelled do to my surgeon knowing it was to risky to operate and have a risk of spreading it elsewhere, which has upset me so much I've waited months for this much needed surgery..
I feel so confused I feel numb, I've 2 children with him. I beleive he really thought I'd never find out, and what hurts is he's been looking me in the eye for months telling me he wouldn't cheat, knowing full well he had, so that's where it comes to do I or have I ever mentioned anything to him? He signed up to this adult work site back march 2024 I only have proof of 2 he's been with but I can guarantee there's more, the 2 I know about was 1 I was away with my children visiting grandparents and the 2nd was Christmas Eve.. he's sending me messages like -
I'm sorry Emma, I honestly am. Give it time and I promise I will make it up to you, I want more babies with you, I want to spent the rest of my life with you
But Emma, honestly, I think about what I've done and I know I fucked up, it hurts me deeply, and all I want is you and my kids and nothing else. I look at you, and I see my future, I fucking adore you as a woman, my girlfriend, my future wife, the mother to my 2 kids, everything about you is perfect and I mean that from the bottom of my heart
I've got so so much making up to do, I realise after these past few months how much I value you, and how much you've helped me through my life that I want to spend the rest of it protecting and being there for you.
on top of this before I found out all of this, I’d recently uploaded a photo of myself on Facebook no profile photo, and he flipped about it threatening me, calling me a dog a tramp, he hates me I’m disgusting, telling me he’ll drop me on my head. And then once I found all that he’d been doing I’m baffled as to why he’d reacted like that over me posting a photo of myself?!?
I'm so confused I've kept all this to myself since I found out and I'm struggling to process/deal with it, or should I say I don't really know how to deal with it? He's knocked me of my feet, no only this adult work but he's also on a dating site, which he claims he's not but I've seen the login details etc. if you've got this far reading this shit show then I appreciate it, and I hope you can give me some genuine advice, something/anything I need to hear, I just don't know what to do, the lies upon lies, I feel I can't of ment anything neither could our children for him to do it in the first place but then to lie and lie about what actually happened my head is crushed 💔💔