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Original poster

Does anyone else get v nervous of driving although they have passed their test?

22 replies

CrushWithEyeliner · 23/04/2008 10:13

I am starting to feel like a bit of an idiot. I passed my test 3 yrs ago but admittedly have done v little driving since then. Now I am a complete nervous wreck behind the wheel again and DD is of an age now where I am going to have to ferry her around loads more. It is hindering my life and I feel so stupid.

I have done some refresher lessons with a trainer who said I was fine I just really lacked confidence. I just wondered if it was just me

OP posts:

belgo · 23/04/2008 10:16

no not just you....I passed my test 11 years ago and have barely driven since. I've had refresher lessons and the instructor said I drive fine, my dh says I drive fine, but for some reason I just can't do it.

I'm also getting to the point where it's impacting my life in a negetive way.

MargaretMountford · 23/04/2008 10:19

there is an interesting thread somewhere about driving and anxiety...can't find it but someone might remember. Have you thought of hypnotherapy ?

MummyDoIt · 23/04/2008 10:20

Persevere. I passed my test very late in life (late 30s) three years ago and was very nervous. I made myself drive pretty much every day and gradually got more and more confident on the short about-town journeys. I still left all the motorway driving to DH, though. Then he got sick and couldn't drive so I had to do the motorways, especially as every hospital visit involved driving round the M25 at rush hour. I felt physically sick with nerves the first time I did it. However, I've been motorway driving for a year now and don't give it a second thought. It really is just a question of making yourself do it and eventually the confidence will come. In the very early days, I used to take MIL with me on unfamilar journeys as I found it reassuring to have someone else in the car with me.

MargaretMountford · 23/04/2008 10:23

agree with mummydoit...it needs perseverence and practice - just get in and drive. I passed my test but didn't drive for quite a few yrs after and took a refresher course including some motorway driving to build my confidence. After that I just kept at it...it soon becomes second nature and the freedom and flexibility it gives you is fantastic.

sarah293 · 23/04/2008 10:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

andiem · 23/04/2008 10:28

I feel the same was shunted up the back when stationary at xmas and feel nervous now

but I think the key is to just do it I drove to cornwall and back last week with the dcs from london and I feel much better since doing it

I hate the big lorries too

sweetkitty · 23/04/2008 10:33

I passed my test 9 years ago and did no real driving until 3 years ago when I had DD2 and double buggies and buses don't really mix. I drive every day now but still hate it, DP does the motorways and big drives, I ferry the DDs around town. I have had hypnotherapy as well.

I have general anxiety and it's worse just now as I am pregnant and it's coming out in my driving as well, I can feel myself panicking at every roundabout just now.

I hate driving when it's busy as well, if only every drive was like a Sunday at 9am I would be fine

I feel like an idiot too and know I could do more with the DDs if I could get over this fear.

OrmIrian · 23/04/2008 10:36

I was at first. The answer is just to get out there on your own and do some driving. Find a quiet area to start with and just drive. I had to drive from Somerset to Cambden on my own a week after I passed. That was scary but I did it and it sort of helped.

Original poster

CrushWithEyeliner · 23/04/2008 10:37

Oh God thank you all for being so honest - not just me!
I know I just have to do it, but I am a bag of nerves and white-knuckled at the wheel. So silly. The roundabouts, they freak me out. God knows how I passed first time.

OP posts:

belgo · 23/04/2008 10:39

'just do it's doesn't really help very much I'm afraid. I've tried to 'just do it' for the past 11 years.

The problem is I become so nervous that my mind seizes up and I become literally tunnel visioned, and I simply can't do it.

Hypo therapy sounds interesting, I've also been wondering about something like that as the 'just do it' approach simply isn't working.

I've achieved a huge amount in my life and this is the only thing that I am consistently failing on.

VanillaPumpkin · 23/04/2008 10:41

It just takes practice.
I hate driving in the dark at the moment as I have not had to do it for SOOOOOO long, yet when I was working/younger (and had a life and went out ) I regularly drove in the dark without problems.
I used to hate motorway driving and used to make my DH come with me. Now I can regularly do 4.5 hour trips to my mums on my own with two dd's.
I also was rubbish at parallel parking, but then we lived on a road where there was no offroad parking and so I had to learn......
I still prefer to be driven.
Practice practice practice!!!! Good Luck!

VanillaPumpkin · 23/04/2008 10:43

Sorry Buda - didn't read your posts and didn't mean to trivialise.
FWIW my v v v v brainy friend from school who got A's for everything and went to Oxford and is now a lecturer there just could not get driving AT ALL! I don't think he drives to this day.

belgo · 23/04/2008 10:45

I think you mean me I've jsut reread my post and I haven't achieved a 'huge amount' - I've achieved a lot - but by no means a huge amount.

Good luck crushwitheyeliner. Hope you are better at getting this sorted then I am.

MargaretMountford · 23/04/2008 10:47

I don't know anything about this particular hypnotherapist but you might be interested in the RAC driving thing herewww.themagicofyou.co.uk/bristol/hypnotherapy/driving-anxiety.php

SoMuchToBits · 23/04/2008 10:53

Yes, so much so that I don't drive. I learned when I was about 25, and after more than 2 years of lessons, passed my test on the 3rd attempt. However I felt just as nervous after passing my test as I had done the first time I got in a car as a driver.

I did drive after passing my test, for about 6 months, although was petrified every time I got in the car, and frequently got lost . Eventually I had a small accident (not my fault) and found it impossible to get back in and drive again after that.

I also feel that driving is something I'm not very good at. With a lot of activities that wouldn't matter - if you were rubbish at drawing, the worst that would happen if you drew pictures would be that someone else wouldn't like them. But if you drive and are not good at it, you can potentially kill someone. I can't live with that, so I don't drive.

VanillaPumpkin · 23/04/2008 10:56

Sorry Belgo . Getting my European locations in a muddle....

OrmIrian · 23/04/2008 10:58

I didn't pass my test till I was 26. It took 5 attempts . And I had to have beta blockers to get me through my last test as I was so terrified.

But within a few weeks I was driving myself to work and back every day. I don't know what else to say but... practice. Sorry if that's not helpful.

queenrollo · 23/04/2008 11:17

i'm still nervous.....i'm not too bad on the daily journey to work. I have a real fear of going to places i've never been before, and i have a fear of not being able to get parked.

I cannot park in a car park if it means pulling into a space between two cars.......because i just have appalling awareness of the size of my car.

I have to take dp to a van hire place on saturday am, in a town with a horrible road system and i feel sick and anxious about it already. I've never driven there, even though they have really good shops because the roads there just terrify me.

minster · 23/04/2008 11:44

I took me about a year of regular driving until I felt okay about it - you just have to do it & practice does improve your confidence.

MummyDoIt · 23/04/2008 11:49

If you can get one, a satnav really does help on unfamiliar journeys. I wouldn't be without ours. You're not stressing about turnings and looking for road signs so you can concentrate on your driving. Plus they give you advance notice of exits and turns so you can make sure you're in the right lane.

branflake81 · 23/04/2008 20:33

I passed age 25 after SEVEN attempts . I think I am quite a crap driver and an even worse parker, but make myself do it because I'm scared I'll forget how and have to do the bloody test again.

VanillaPumpkin · 24/04/2008 16:15

I took four tests and was 21 by the time I managed it. I started lessons at 17. I have spent a fotune.
I have been driving for ten years now though and consider myself really quite competent now.

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