Neighbour"s dc seriously ill, not sure what to do?

[Teaortea]

We barely speak to or see our next door neighbours, we are different generations and we keep to ourselves. We're always polite when we do see them.
I was in a queue behind the man a few weeks ago. I'm terrible at small talk so asked if they had any holidays planned. He said his dc was seriously ill but that was a story for another time. I didn't want to pry so didn't ask for details. I felt unsure what to say so asked how their pets were ans we laughed about their cat's antics.
Few days later my friend showed me an article in the local paper about my neighbour's dc who has cancer and how they were fundraising for a family holiday.
The dc has been ill for 10 months, we had no idea!
I feel so sad for the family, but don't know if I'd be interfering by saying anything?
I also feel terrible for babbling on about our holiday and pets etc

For a bit more context our dc was ill and in hospital for 9 months, not with cancer and they were older but I understand a little of the trauma and way your life changes and revolves around hospitals and that child's care I felt like in a bubble at the time and didn't expect anything from our previous neighbours.

But their dc is younger and not out of the woods.
I've anonymously donated to their fundraiser but wonder if I should go knock with a gift for the dc and offer to help??

My son was diagnosed with cancer back last year and the neighbours who we hadn’t spoke to much made a point of every Monday morning knocking on the door to see how he was and tbh it was really nice to have someone different to talk to and who wasn’t directly involved so she didn’t cry she just listened. I say pop round I’m sure they’d appreciate it xx

You don't need to take a gift. Just either knock on their door or, preferably, speak to them when they you are outside and just be nice. Say you will keep an eye on the house if they're away in hospital, tell them if they need anything at all, night or day, to just knock on your door. Give them a (very) brief history and tell them you get it. Just don't put any expectations on them and offer nothing but a shoulder and no hate if they don't accept it.

I have a seriously ill child and the thing I appreciated most from our neighbours was just being easy when we had to sort things like fencing together. I don't really want a lot of involvement from them (unless a friendship was to naturally develop) but just being friendly, easy neighbours is the best thing.

I wouldn't want someone to become more familiar just because I found myself in a trying situation if they wouldn't have otherwise. I'm not their charity case. If they weren't interested in me before, I don't want them to change their level of involvement.

If I heard my neighbour was going through something similar I'd drop them a card telling them I didn't want to intrude (maybe they already have enough support) but telling them that I found other parents who had been the same so helpful at the time, so if they wanted to come over for a cuppa (or me come to them), please let me know.

In the "olden days" ie the late 1970s, I nearly died and my Mum to this day still remembers the amount of the older women (ie women whose children were now young adults and above) who popped round to check on her and not me.

If it were me I'd probably get a card and let them know you don't want to intrude, but you're thinking of them and if there's anything you can do for them to let you know - even if it's just a cup of tea and a chat x
They'll appreciate it x

I’d give them my phone number and ask them to call me if they needed anything. Milk after a hospital stay, feed the cat, sign for parcels etc.

If going around to their door is more than you'd normally do, then maybe a 'thinking of you' card or a blank one with some words of who you are, your phone number and you are thinking of them/happy to help/put bins out of whatever- depending on how well you know them.

I would take a small gift for him and let them know you’re available if needed. Do they have your phone number? I’d give them that just in case they ever needed a chat, emergency childcare or a cup of milk.

Maybe ask if there are any treats he enjoys and you could drop some off every now and then.

Take round some food cottage pie or somthing they can stick in the freezer, bet they are not having time for loads of cooking. Thinking of you card.

Yes I have only been to their door once or twice in three years so feels a bit intrusive.

Thanks everyone, I'll pop a card in their letterbox with my number etc as some of you have suggested, and let them know I'm here if they want but no pressure.