If someone said I will sort it with you beforehand what do you understand by it

[ErinAoife]

Could you please clarify if I misunderstood this sentence? My daughter's aunt texted me that she wants to bring my daughter swimming and she will sort it with me beforehands. Her aunt was away on holiday when she texted me that. My daughter came back from her father at the weekend and told me that they visited her aunt and my daughter asked her about the swimming as I told her that her aunt wants to bring her and her aunt replied that I did not contact her so she did not do it. I did not even know she was back from holiday and my understanding of her text was that she will contact me when she is back to sort out when it is convenient. Am i wrong to have think that?.

Your post is a bit confusing as to who is where, but I agree there was miscommunication.

To sort it out beforehand is exactly that... Here is an idea, but we will sort out the details before the time of the event. Whether that was up to you or her is up in the air, but since the aunt invited your daughter, I would have thought she would have gotten back to you.

To sort it out beforehand means arrange the finer details before the event. As the aunt invited your daughter, I would have presumed she would get in touch to arrange the arrangements. Yes, you could have followed it up, but so could she.

I would expect you to reply to Aunt and say, ok that's fine we can sort it out nearer the time.

Then leave it to her to contact you to sort it out.

Did you reply to her original messaging (at the time) saying she'd like to take your daughter swimming?

I would take it to mean that she will contact you when she's ready to take her swimming.

I understand from her text that she will contact me when she is back from her holiday, but she did not. I did not contact her as I have a lot on my plate at the moment, I am not the one who had asked her to bring my daughter swimming. She offered to do it. I don't care one way or another if she do it or not, but I don't like that she told my daughter that she did not bring her because I did not contact her. I am sorry but if I want to organise something with my nephew/niece I always contact the parents I don't ask the parent to organise it, she is not doing me a favour by bringing her swimming.

She was expecting you to a knowledge the initial text with something like “great idea, let’s talk details when you’re back from holiday” or something like that.

As you did not even acknowledge the suggestion she thought that you were against swimming in principle.

I did acknowledge her text by thanking her when she said she wanted to bring her swimming. We had that day a text conversation about her holiday. I don't know she always do stuff like that to me, saying something, but doesn't really mean it. She often said, "See you at the weekend when I rang her or pop up for a visit, but she never came to visit me,

Why do you call her your daughter's aunt rather than just you sister or SIL? Is she someone you're not generally in contact with? If you just said thanks and not a more enthusiastic "sounds great, DD would love that" type message she might have thought you didn't really want her to do it.

She's in the wrong. It means I'll sort out the finer details nearer the time. She didn't. Mind you neither did you, You could've text her to ask exactly when.

I am separated from my husband (he cheated, he denied but had proof)and since she is introduced me as a friend and no longer as her sil.