Alone

[EuphemiaEmmet]

I'm nearly 70. I grew up with parents who didn't socialise. They didn't entertain nor go anywhere. My father hated visitors. I was determined my children were raised differently and made an effort. But I've always disliked (maybe too strong a word) to have ppl round or go visiting. Now my children are all grown up and husband left I've reverted back . I've very few friends, some who have given up contacting me. Tbh I'm happy in my own little world. I love being on my own. If I go out I can't wait to walk through my front door. I'm not looking for answers as I know it's how I was brought up, I just want to know if this resonates with anyone else?

It would resonate with my mum. She enjoys her own company. A little too much really. During lockdowns she lost contact with the few remaining friends she has and now she's lost her husband the isolation is affecting her mental health - she literally has nobody to talk to (other than family).

So I say great, if you enjoy the isolation and your own company but maybe look at the bigger picture, even if it's making the effort to catch up with friends once a month, or go out to a club once a week. Just something to help you appreciate the solitude of your own home when you return and maintain a small network of support when the going gets tough.

This is really great advice. I enjoy being alone and long for the weekends when I don't have to see anyone. But I worry that one day it'll catch me out and I'll start to regret being so antisocial.
PP's comments seem like the perfect advice to me.

It resonates with me. I'm content with little social contact and with my own company (and my family who live with me). I've been through social times but, at this point, have decided to accept and honour my reclusive tendencies. I'm not very social at the moment.

That said, I know that social connection is important (at least know it academically) and would hate to regret it one day, so I do maintain a couple of interest groups and friendships outside the family.

I don’t think it’s necessarily upbringing. I am 52 and grew up with timid, friendless parents who never socialised or had visitors. I spent my teens and early 20s figuring out friendships, and in adulthood have always had strong, longterm friendships despite moving countries often. I adore time alone, too, and have spent periods entirely alone, including a year on an uninhabited island brfore I married and had DS, but what I saw in my parents was no way to live.