Long one so bear with me...
We have a 3.5 year old, I normally work 3 days a week, my little one does 2 days at preschool a week and the final day alternating between my mum and mother in law. We've been so lucky to have this set up and are so grateful to both our mums.
We're currently expecting baby 2 any day now and both my husband and I agree his mum probably isn't able to have both children together when I go back to work in 9 months. I love my MIL to bits, however we both think it'll just be too much for her. She regularly falls asleep having our little one on her days if they're watching a film and you can tell she's struggling a lot with the energy required to keep up with a little one which we totally understand. Her health has declined in the last couple of years, along with my in laws getting a dog that wakes them regularly which all contributes to the tiredness.
We've also had a couple of near misses/disagreements in the past over things such as grapes being cut the right way and a toddler fall down the stairs etc. Again, not the end of the world and these things happen but all these things add up. The issue is she won't voluntarily say it's too much (despite knowing herself it will be). How do we approach this? The other issue we'll have is my mum could probably do every Friday but I just know this won't go down well when it's realised, which again I totally understand. For context, my mum is 8 years younger and doesn't have the health conditions. Such a tricky situation to be in...
Just to reiterate, I love my MIL and can't thank her enough, just such a tough one to be in. Part of me just thinks do we suck it up as it's only 2 days a month ultimately but I just know I'd be worried on those days... Any advice gratefully received x