Does anyone have a alovely fab friend with a horrid spolit brat child? How do you handle it?

[yorkshirepudding]

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WIsh I could think of something clever to say but I think sans kids is probably the best way to go, unless it's better if they come to you instead?

JAAS I think what you said is spot on

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be strict towards bullying in your own home - i'd have no qualms about quashing this

other than that you just have to accept it

she sounds a bit immature tbh

other people's kids ARE annoying on the whole I find

Some of the loveliest parents at my DS's old school had the most hideous brats for children. Unless your DD actually enjoys her DDs company, then I think you'll have to avoid visits with the children.

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sounds like it

I have a couple of friends with kids like this - both boys though and younger

drives me demented

they arent actually nasty to my childrne though

just wet and irritating

agree with a mum in scotland. if they don't to play with each other at 10, then I wouldn't force it.

Maybe she's less mature than your DD? Can't they cary a lot at that age

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I'm very lucky that so far, my kids friends are nice, and their parents are nice, we all sieem to have fairly similar attitudes towards parenting. The odd couple of slightly brattish kids (and my DS has his moments too) I try to limit time with.

However, I have lost a friend because I couldn't stand her duaghter. I was this little girls godmother, and found it so hard to be around the whining attention seeking little darling, that last time I saw her was 3 years ago, when I delivered a birthday present. She didn't even thank me, and mother didn't prompt her too. I decided enough was enough.

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I can remember my mother inflicting some of her friend's feral children on us every summer holiday & use to dread visiting. In the end I used to take a book and sit on the porch when told to go and play. Only when my brother also started voluntarily reading on these visits did she understand how reluctant we were to go. I think she visited once afterwards on her own leaving us with my elderly grandmother, and after that the friendship dwindled.

Can you leave dd at home, drop her off at another friend or activity etc when you visit? Or at least host on 'home' territory?

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We have good friends with a child we just do not like no matter how hard we try - it is a horrible feeling.

...it's difficult when you are friends but your children look like they are not friends.
I'd see her minus offspring from now on. It's not fair on your DD to have to interact with an unlikeable child who she does not have a lot in common with, and you can't like everyone, child or adult.

My friend has a child I don't exactly warm to so I don't go round there when he is about, he is an attention seeker too.

The other thing to bear in mind is that friend's child might not always be horrid. They do grow up and change. I was a little madam when younger and now at thinking of some of the things I said and did.

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Other people's children are usually very annoying. They do things like coming up to you and BARGING INTO TE MIDDLE OF A CONVERSATION with a mouthful of half-chewed crisps to ask their dad/mum something. Even more annoying is when said dad/mum stops talking to you in order to address irritating child's issue!

I'd be honest with her. Just say the DD's don't seem to get on so you'll visit out of hours so that you can chat properly. She's probably thinking the same thing.

Before I had my own I loved kids. Now I have 2 who I adore, I've found that other peoples kids just get on my nerves. (obviously not mnet kids!)

im with you on this one Unquietdad!

God it drives me MENTAL when said brats come running up to interrupt the conversation i am having with their mum, then for the mum to suddenly abandon the conversation with me to start talking to/go off with the brat.

i never let my children interrupt my conversations, its hideously rude!!!

Other people's kids are unbearable at times, especially in the holidays when they have come round to trash your house and be rude to you.
Or when they are being foul and jumping all over your sofas with shoes on, and their mum just says "oh Johnny, arent you just FULL of energy today? maybe you should get down from there?"

Then i bloody feel like screaming " GET OFF MY FUCKING COUCH AND CHEWING WITH YOUR MOUTH OPEN, LEARN SOME FUCKING MANNERS WHEN YOU ARE IN SOMEONE ELSE'S HOUSE!"

Ahhhh, rant over.

Totally agree with allgone and Udad...I always give mine 'the look' and they stand and wait.. I can't stand rude kids!

I'd think carefully about telling her, tbh. It may lead to an honest exchange! How would you feel if she countered with things about your daughter? Which she may do. Especially if she feels defensive. Perhaps just see her alone, after all, just because she's your friend, doesn't mean the kids have to get together.