Trying to keep this as non-identifying as possible!
I've been with DH for 5 years and we have a 6 month old DC. DH is in the military, and lived abroad when we first met and did distance for the first 18 months together. We now have an opportunity to look at going back to this country as a family. He's always said that's what he wants and I've always been on board. Now the chance has actually come around I'm torn between really wanting the opportunity and not being totally sure it's a good idea. I went out there to visit him a few times back when we were first together so I feel like I've had the opportunity to "preview" what it might be like. And everyone we know who's done it has loved it.
However, I feel guilty taking my DC away from the extended family, and whether or not it's fair on both DC and the family members. We already live quite far away from our families - so it’s not like we see them all the time anyway. I worry about my own career - I currently out-earn DH and work in a profession which I know i could do out there, but there wouldn’t be a lot of opportunities. I worry about having a job when we would come back, the knock on on my pension etc. I worry about having to embrace the whole "military wife" thing - which I usually can't stand. I live in a part of the country far away from the friends I had before (who I am absolutely still friends with, I just don't see each other often) and have made some new ones here, but I worry those aren't strong enough to maintain if we were to leave, and then come back in a few years.
On the other hand, it would be an adventure together, and I'd have more time to spend with DC while they are still young, and I could possibly have the time and space for another baby, which we want. I think the environment there would be fantastic for both us, and our DC. And ultimately I want us to go. DH says he's happy for us to not go, if I don't want to, but I do! I just think there are so many angles to consider.
What should we do? IPO I