I don't have any friends and desperate for support as I am dying inside.
I (44) had been with my partner (35) for 8.5 years, we have a daughter. I have supported him in everyday possible for those years, including financially. He worked for about 6 months in total of our relationship. We moved to a new area to escape my abusive ex husband 2 years ago. Last summer he met a woman at our child's school, she asked him and our child out at least once a week over the holidays. My gut told me something was off but they both denied anything was or would happen. They then began to have coffee mornings, days out shopping, even running together in the evenings. I was told I was crazy to feel insecure and wary. 4 months ago, we had a huge row after he went clubbing for her birthday. I was invited but when I asked if he would come home with me when I wanted to leave, he said no, so I stayed home. The next morning I asked him to get a job and move out. He never left and I tried to get him back, loving him completely but I was met with a brick wall, telling me he HAD to move out. Well, 3 weeks ago I read their messages to each other on a hidden app. He dropped her immediately, saying he wants me. I confronted them both about the I love yous, my soul mate, my wife/husband, (she's actually married) new adventure when he leaves etc. They both said it was over and it was stupid and they were sorry. (She actually go shitty with me first until I said she's lucky her husband doesn't know.)
He still lives here and is upset that I want to take our daughter to the places she'll be. I.e. school run and an after school club. I'm trying to trust but there is no give, just take.
This morning, I bumped into our neighbour and mentioned that he and I had split. She asked if it was because of this school mum. I am now boiling inside that they were so f'ing obvious that other people noticed. I don't know what to do. My 3 children don't know anything and I have begun to transfer this pain to my arms, something I've never done before. I'm completely broken, awaiting therapy. I seem to be the only one suffering in this. I'm considering changing my daughter's school and contemplating telling her husband.
Thank you for reading 💔