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Embarrassing and sensitive problem

26 replies

SoSoAshamed · 16/03/2008 21:33

I am a regular, but I have name changed as I am utterly ashamed of what I am about to type. If anyone realises who I am, i'd appreciate them keeping it to themselves.

Not long after I got with my ex partner, years ago, he persuaded me to have sex with him whilst being filmed. I was quite young and naive and agreed although immediatly regretted it.

Over the years my then partner regularly used to rewatch the tape, and I grew more and more ashamed of what i'd done.

As our relationship began to fall apart, I found the tape and hid it. I knew at that point that our relationship was over and I didn't trust him to keep the tape to himself, plus I hated the thought of him watching it.

Fast forward to the other day, and I gave him a bag of stuff of his that i'd found at the back of the cupboard. He emptied it all out and said there was something missing. I asked him what, and he said a camcorder tape. I told him then that I knew which tape he meant and that I had it and would not be giving it to him.
He started ranting and raving at me, saying that I had no right to keep it as he was on the tape too and he had every right to have it back and watch it. I refused to give it to him and he left.

Today when I saw him, he said he'd been showing our children some camcorder tapes of when they were babies. I hadn't realised that he had these, and asked if I could borrow them to make copies. He refused saying that if I wouldn't give him the tape of us having sex, then I couldn't have the tapes of the children. He was very smug, and I think he thought i'd hand the tape over then, but I didn't, and told him that infact I was going to destroy the tape to make sure he never ever got it.
He got really angry, pleaded with me to give it to him and then called me a bitch and stormed off when I refused again.

So the question is now, what do I do about the tapes with the kids on ? I only want to borrow them to make copies and then he can have them back, but there is no way on earth I can give him the tape of us.

OP posts:
SoSoAshamed · 16/03/2008 22:04

Yes Flibberty, that is what he wants it for, and why I don't want him to have it. The thought makes me heave.

I will destroy it tonight and then bin all the little bits.

OP posts:
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