Has anybody got a great MIL?

[PABLOP]

Got to admit I'm shocked at the venom levelled at MIL's. Are they all so horrible? For the record my MIL is absolutley fantastic, she is a friend, supportive, helpful and a good laugh too. My DH adores my mum, they get on really well. Surely there must be some mumsnetters out there with great mil's?? Remember you all will probably be a mil one day.
I'd be mortified if I was hated so much

Pab, my mil is great too, but unfortunately there are some "toxic" people out there. Those of us with nice mils are just lucky!

My MIL is great. We've always got on pretty well. My IL's do live a long way away (3 hrs drive), so we only see them once a month on average. They are looking after dd for a week over Easter to help us out with school hols!

I have a wonderful mil and my dh likes my mun alot too

I have a great MIL - she's lovely, we get on, what's to post about?? People come on here to let off steam (I hope) so inevitably you get a skewed view. Somewhere buried in the archives is an unbelievably horrible thread about my father which I posted the day after he'd visited me for 3 days - I had steam coming out of my ears at the time and didn't want to rant at anybody in RL. We get on OK most of the time!

I must say though, when Grannyjane published the Good Granny Guide she also said that she was fairly shocked at the level of bile directed at MILs in particular on here.

I wish I had a great MIL but sadly I don't . I am perceived by her not to be good enough for her little boy.

However, my DH and my mum get on great!

my MIL is lovely, if slightly batty! my own mum can also be batty - so it's pretty even, but we love them to bits.

But some MILs seem very self-centred and non-helpful... especially to DILs I think, so we must all remember how to behave when we are MILs!

I'm pleased that you get on with your MIL. But before you say things like "remember you will be a MIL one day", please bear in mind that some of us have a great deal to put up with from our MILs, and MN is the only place that we are able to vent.

In a lot of cases, the venom that you see is well deserved.

I have a lovely MIL. Have known her since I was 16y and her, and FIL, simply treat me as they would DH and BIL, as a daughter I guess.

I have been on holiday with them, they look after DD for us whenever we need them too, they are great. yes, we may not see eye to eye one evrything - but that is just ifferent generations and different personalities for you. It's all about making allowances, listening to advice and then taking just the bits you need, tolerance, and compromise. I wanted my relationship with my in laws to work, as do they - so it was going to work for us as we were prepared to work together.

I agree however that there are some nasty people out there - some happen to MILs, some happen to be DILs too. So I can see where some relationships are doomed before they even have a chance.

Do you think it is a generational thing? Is your MIL a similar age to your own mum?

I have a MIL who is closer in age to my gran than my mum and I think that it is just the start of our problems...

I also think the whole MIL/DIL relationship is what both sides make it - my MIL has made no attempt to get to understand me ..

Sorry for lowering the tone, the words MIL is like a red rag to a bull for me...

I am so lucky to have a great MIL, I love her to bits. she is mom to 5 kids and now over 10 grandkids. she is not a soft pushover in fact I would hate to be on the receiving end of her temper! She has been so supportive of me and even when DH and I have had problems she tells me "if you want to leave him you can come and live with me". I am leaving DH in a few months (but only because he is staying in the UK and I am going back to Tx) and I will be living with MIL for 2 months.

On the other side of this my own Mother and sister have chosen not to have anything to do with me, DH or DS, so sad, I dont understand it.

My MIL is great. She is a busy lady, she still works part time, and her and her new husband have 7 kids and 7 grandchildren between them so we only see her every few months, but she is supportive and thoughtful. Has had dd (19 months) overnight so we can have a night in a hotel and recently sent a whole load of vitamins through the post when we weren't well.

My mum is great too. Its just a pity they both leave at least 4 hours drive away....but at least they are great when we do see them.

Mine is lovley

FIL is a grade A w*er though so makes up for it

Mine is bonkers and lives too far away to help out, but what's great about her is that she's hands-off. She is kind and loving and likes to cuddle DS when she does see him, but she has never, ever criticised me, DS or DP, our parenting skills, our choices or decisions. She just remarks on how happy DS is and how great we are with him. I realise how lucky I am when I see people's MIL stories on here...

I do. My MIL is brilliant and all my friends wish she was theirs.

Mine is OK. No great but not a monster like some seem to be.

Mine is superb

We had some low key mother in law issues when we were first married - now that I have a ds though, I understand how much she loves dh, and forgive her for worrying how much weight he was losing when we got married etc!!! She used to send us home with food parcels.

On the whole, she's fine - and I know I'm lucky.

My MIL is great very supportive. Unfortunately she lives 3 hours away but we do manage to go up to her and her down to us several times a year. DS and DSS absolutly adore her and she them. My mother on the other hand must be a nightmare MIL for DP I only just tolerate her

I like mine we have similar interests but don't see each other much, a couple of times a year maybe. but we occasionally write to each other or talk on the phone.

she does have weird ideas about breastfeeding but does not interfere

My DH has a fantastic MIL

Can't fault my MIL at all ... real star (and as my Mum lives on the other side of the world - she is a god send ... ahhhhhhhhhh)