Just not feeling great about the situation...any advice?

[KayeEx]

After some advice on this situation let me know your thoughts.I don't no if i am over reacting? My partner has previous drug and alcohol abuse history which has caused issues in regards to lies in the past. If only he was open and honest with me so I could support him instead of lying this has now caused trust issues after he has lied about things and snuck around behind my back even when I have point blank asked him out right about things. We have 2 sons together which I mainly have with me 24-7 apart from when they are at school to which I am at work. The in laws are no support so we do not get any alone time together for date nights.
My Partner works night shift so we barley see each other and he is no support for helping with school runs etc when he has his days off they still attend out of school club which he refuses to help pay for so this impacts my finances. On his days off he does very minimal within the house apart from sitting playing on his Xbox. When we do see each other he is snappy as if my presence just annoys him even breathing in the same room. I pretty much do everything in the house he does not cook does not clean. When we go to bed on a night he will wait till I am asleep then go and sleep on the sofa, shows me no affection at all and is not intimate he makes me feel so alone. He is very secretive with his phone and says he sleeps on the sofa because he cant sleep even though he can nap for the world when me and the kids are home. I just feel like he is hiding something. When I have questioned this he bites my head off. I am very supportive of him and just feel like I can't do right. Do I leave him? How can I approach the situation? Every time I try to ask how he is feeling or explain how I am he doesn't want to no

I don't see why your focus is him 'hiding something'? Surely, regardless of whether or not he's being unfaithful, the main issue is that he's a dreadful, neglectful husband and father, and the relationship is simply not working at all?

I think you know the answer to that.

I would be setting myself up for a clean break, that’s no environment for yourself let alone the kids.

You sound like a single parent as it is, so take control of your own life and don’t feel you need to be on eggshells around him. Life is too short for that shit!

It just makes me wonder whether the reason he is being this way is because there is someone else in the picture or if he taking drugs again. It saddens me just the fact of when I ask generally concerned there's just no conversation about anything

Does it matter why he's being like this? If its drugs, another woman, or just his terrible personality, you're still bearing the brunt of his shitty behaviour and he is unwilling to even discuss things, let alone change.

So you knew he had a drug problem before so you had kids with him, and you are now worried about date nights?

I think you need to think about your priorities

to be honest it really doesn't matter what he's up to. he doesn't bring anything to the relationship. Who owns the property ? Ask yourself what would happen if he left tommorrow ? what would you gain ? what would you loose? it sounds to me like you would be alot better off without him.

Just to clear this up no I didn't realise he had a drug problem before we had kids this started when he suffered an injury and started self medicating