Am I in the wrong?

[leasimones]

Today I was shopping with my son who is four and my newborn son who is 5weeks old, I decided to get the bus home as I’ve had a C-section and walking back to the house after being out for a couple of hours completely wipes me.
I got onto the bus, which was quite busy, my older son went and sat on a seat in the middle of the bus, there was an elderly lady sat on the chair in the wheelchair part of the bus, she had a zimmerframe with a chair on it, I politely asked her if she could move her zimmer to the right slightly. Just so I could pop the pram in the available space next to her.

she looked at me like how dare I ask her, I then asked if there was a problem after she had muttered something to her friends. She looked at me then proceeded to shout “this is for wheelchairs not for prams and babies” so I stated that she didn’t have a wheel chair so if her statement was correct why was she sitting there, I then asked where she would like me to place my newborn and pram on a busy bus if I couldn’t use the space next to her? She started shouting at me again stating it was only for wheel chairs. I got really embarrassed and upset, as the bus driver got out of the cab to try calm down the situation, bust at this point everyone had watched everything unfold so I asked my son to come with me and I would wait for the next bus.
The elderly lady said “bugger off then you spoilt little brat” I replied “ I’m the spoilt brat you’re acting like that at your old age imagine that”

I got off the bus absolutely in tears because I was so embarrassed and angry. But now I can’t get out of my head if I was in the wrong, I understand that the area is for wheel chairs and if a wheel chair user had got onto the bus I would have happily got off the bus to make sure their was room for them. I’m not a rude person and a wheelchair is of high priority I am very understanding of this. But I just feel like I was in the wrong somehow. I maybe shouldn’t have responded the way I did but I was so upset that she was so rude to me in the first place.

can someone put my mind at ease please. TIA

I'm sure you did no wrong. These public spaces are for us all to share and she sounds like she'd got out of bed the wrong side.

What an unpleasant situation at a time when you really could have done without it. Do something lovely and forget all about it.

Thank you so much I've really let it get on top of me, I'm going to go for a little walk try breathe through it! Thank you again

She sounds horrible, OP. I don't think you did anything wrong. Try not to dwell on it any further.

Hey, let's bash old people again. What Mumsnet does best.

She was rude and obnoxious. Her age is immaterial.

I think it's just this one elderly person who's behaviour we are being invited to critique here. Not a general swathe of the population

she sounds unwell, I doubt it was anything you did

She sounds like a knob. I would have been equally upset and annoyed. Breathe and move on.

She sounds horrible - you perhaps shouldn't have reacted like that but it can be hard in the heat of the moment, especially when she'd been so rude first.

My son has a wheelchair, and yes we get priority in that space over other non-wheelchair users, but I always try and make space for a buggy as well if they can fit in there too.

YANBU

• those spaces ARE for prams as-well as wheelchairs, and elderly infirm people. They are there for ease of the people needing them, otherwise, where would you sit on the bus with baby?

The elderly person was in the wrong. You were not asking her to move, just slightly move her zimmer frame, she sounds like a crazy bitch! Hope you're ok.

You did nothing wrong OP. That woman sounds awful. Maybe she was in pain and/or struggling but that would not negate your needs which c/s apart you clearly have a newborn and likely to be exhausted.

I agree you did nothing wrong and I have a disabled child!

Priority spaces are priority. That means if only room for one then only one can use it.

If there was room for her rolator and your pram there was no reason for her to be a rude cunt.

Enjoy some newborn cuddles tonight and be reassured most of the world are actually reasonable humans and tomorrows another day.

Please accept a motherly virtual hug from me. She sounds totally batty and it’s a shame some kind person didn’t stick up for you.

Just put it down to being a bad day for a bus ride home. Tomorrow it will be just a tiresome memory.

ChatGPT

You did nothing wrong at all. She was fucking horrible to you. I hope you're ok OP

I think in this instance it's perfectly justified for the OP to be upset when this older person was so bloody nasty to her

Doesn't sound like granny bashing to me? She was entitled and rude by the sounds of it. The other day two mothers parked two pushchairs side by side on our bus- the first woman moved hers across when the second got on at a later stop. There was a bit of an initial collision but both apologised and smiled..you know..just normal people. Being old doesn't give you the right to
be an arsehole.

Put that nasty bitch out of your mind OP.