Worried about social services

[Laure223]

Just looking for some advice, j don't need or want any hate as my head is in a mess as it is. Long story anyways
Basically my ex assaulted me while drunk February last year, it then happened again in April after he was drunk ( he's definitely been spiked as I've never seen him like this before but it's no excuse for what he done )
I was 6 weeks pregnant at the time and I rang the police. Long story short he got out 2 months later and was handed a 2 year suspended sentence.
Social services were called at the end of my pregnancy as a precaution and I understand why and a safety plan was put in place for him to be supervised with our son by our parents until I decided contact can move forward and he can have him on his own. ( he has another son and I know he would never ever hurt his children this was confirmed by social services as they gave me the choice when to let him have our son on his own.)
Basically after 2 and a bit months I met him while my parents had my children and picked up money for my son and a few pieces he had bought for him. I stayed for a cuppa and one thing led to another I ended up sleeping with him.
Now I've found out I'm pregnant 😓 I'm absolutely terrified and don't know what to do as I'm scared of social services
They have proved there is nothing wrong with my parenting and I'm a loving mother and I an not in a relationship with my sons dad so they dropped the case and have no involvement now but now I'm worried as I'm pregnant again and if I keep it what's going to happen.
Has anyone else been through this? As I say we aren't together it was just a one off I slept with him once 😓 please don't give me any hate I'm stupidly emotinal and so worried. Thanks

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If teachers strikes go ahead in February and March, in which of the following ways will it affect your family? Please select all that apply
I/my partner will have to take annual leave
I/my partner will have to work from home with children
I/my partner will have to take unpaid leave
It will disrupt my children's education
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N/A no school age children
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Ahhh. I'm sorry to hear this... but honestly if he's hit you twice while drunk, he will hit you again.

You've got a few options:

1, continue the pregnancy and go to social services yourself, be proactive and work with them, accept any consequences that come of this... maybe ask your parents to write a statement of support for your ex for social services.

2, tell your midwife and let her judge whether a fresh referral is required

3, have a termination and nothing will change as nobody needs to know.

Xx

Oh wow that is a messy situation. But I agree with previous comment, he will probably do it again and if I were you I would be scared for my child as well.
as for the pregnancy I really don’t understand how it is so easy for some people to get pregnant by accident. Also, as harsh as it may sound, I think it is best to terminate the pregnancy if not able to give those innocent babies a decent life

In your shoes I would terminate.

I really don’t understand how it is so easy for some people to get pregnant by accident.

Difficult to believe that an adult would ever think this.

.

I’d terminate to protect your existing child.

I work with children and teenagers and the amount of trauma some of them experience is heartbreaking. This case is not extreme but it’s not ideal either. It just amazes me how some people think children are dolls or accessories

It sounds like you already have more than one child. I wouldn’t want to bring another into a less than ideal situation with a man who shouldn’t be a father.

This man has assaulted you twice
He will do so again
So yes you need support and counselling and ss need to keep an eye on you and your dc for next few years

You are still in a relationship with him if you've slept together again, so it's not going to look great. You need to prioritise the DC you have and get yourself some help so you can stick to the (very sensible) rules and not stay enmeshed with violent exes. It doesn't help that you're still excusing him (must've been spiked). Have you done the Freedom Programme?

I really don’t understand how it is so easy for some people to get pregnant by accident.

If people who've proven to be fertile together don't use contraception then it's hardly low risk. OP can't be naive about this.

ZOMBIE thread

You're no longer with the father so I'm not sure what they would do. How will they find out you're pregnant if they've closed the case?

Have you been advised to do the Freedom Programme? If you feel you can afford to raise and cope with two very young children, then go ahead. I would cut contact with the father and communicate via an app, apply for CMS and ask for money to be put directly into your account. Any items can be handed to a third person. He wasn't spiked OP, he's an animal and you need to keep away.

That's a pain!