Who else feels like it all on them?

[BearKey]

I just feel like it's too much right now. I can't be the mother and the breadwinner and the default parent and the one that sorts the house out and does the life admin and the one who worries about our autistic son. My husband is a great dad, but 90% of 'life' fall on me. Today it's too much. Tomorrow I'll man up and just get one with it, but today I feel sorry for myself. I can't always be strong

I feel like this often. It’s exhausting! The mental and emotional load can be overwhelming can’t it. I find taking some time out for myself helps massively. Even just exercise or a night out with friends helps to switch off a bit and release the pressure.
But also your post shows that you care and it sounds like you are doing a great job op 💐 .

Have you talked to him about the unfair workload?

A great dad in what sense?

I get this. It’s exhausting and lonely and sometimes I just want to scream. When DH does something helpful I thank him etc and go for positive affirmation but I just want to be part of a team where I can lean on someone else when it gets too much. You’re not alone.

How is he a great Dad?

He sounds useless.

Just don't do it.

I had a migraine the other week and I've literally handed my baby to DH and said I will be in the room all day, the baby is fully on you. I said he can call in sick at work, he can hire a nanny, he can fly his parents in from where the live overseas, but I am not able to even lift my baby today.

And closed the bedroom door.

Slept in the dark room all day and migraine was gone.

'a night out with friends helps to switch off a bit'

How is this going to solve a problem of a useless husband?
Just say that cooking is on him today, then get yourself a frozen ready meal for 1 in case he doesn't cook. Eat it and go to bed.

Same with bills. Let it pile up. Let it get to the debt company - I wouldn't give a f.
Why are you doing it all?