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Original poster

Go Fund Me/ Raising funds ideas - weight

28 replies

MumnMore · 05/01/2023 00:25

I’m new here but expecting a fair bit of negativity in response to my post…

I am an overweight mother of two. I work hard in a school and I manage to run the household on my earnings.

Lately, I’ve been experiencing anxiety going out, feeling like I’m being watched and laughed at and even at school I feel the kids are laughing at my appearance.

I have tried losing weight and I feel exhausted with it.

I can’t save much and have a poor credit history from a few years back. It’s slowly improving but I don’t think I can borrow despite having some disposable income and would be quite nervous to with the current cost of living crisis.

I am wondering if anyone can help me with how I can raise money for weight loss surgery? I considered Go Fund Me but I wouldn’t want to share it with friends and family and don’t think anyone would actually help (I understand why).

I even considered Only Fans which is laughs considering my appearance.

I wonder if there are people that loan to others? Like a goodwill gesture? I’d 100% pay the money back. I just need someone to trust in me. Any ideas at all?

OP posts:
IDontCareMatthew · 05/01/2023 00:36

Do you qualify for weight loss surgery?

What's your weight and height?

JamMakingWannaBe · 05/01/2023 00:40

Who will look after your children as you recover from surgery? Can they not help you out with childcare now for you to focus on your health/weight loss?

999caffeineplease · 05/01/2023 00:41

What do you mean you feel exhausted by losing weight? In what way?

What type of weight loss surgery are you considering? Surgery is not a cure for your weight issues - it will require a massive lifestyle change and if you have been unable to make this change as it is, the likelihood is you will be unable to make the change post-surgery.

IDontCareMatthew · 05/01/2023 00:46

Can your parents loan the cash to you?

MintJulia · 05/01/2023 00:50

It sounds like you would be better with the support of a good personal trainer rather than surgery. Someone who helps you with food/exercise knowledge & motivation and moral support rather than the boot-camp type.

Probably no less expensive but infinitely safer and more likely to succeed. Don't get yourself into debt over weight loss.

Is there a local ParkWalk group?

Original poster
MumnMore · 05/01/2023 01:11

IDontCareMatthew · 05/01/2023 00:36

Do you qualify for weight loss surgery?

What's your weight and height?

I don't qualify. Where I am my BMI needs to be 50 and it's around 41. I would feel terrible having this kind of surgery on the NHS anyhow

OP posts:
Original poster
MumnMore · 05/01/2023 01:12

JamMakingWannaBe · 05/01/2023 00:40

Who will look after your children as you recover from surgery? Can they not help you out with childcare now for you to focus on your health/weight loss?

I don't see how childcare would contribute to weight loss

OP posts:
Gingerkittykat · 05/01/2023 01:14

Can you go on the NHS waiting list? To qualify you need a BMI of 40+ or 35 plus health problems caused by your weight.

Waiting times vary a lot depending on area.

Original poster
MumnMore · 05/01/2023 01:15

999caffeineplease · 05/01/2023 00:41

What do you mean you feel exhausted by losing weight? In what way?

What type of weight loss surgery are you considering? Surgery is not a cure for your weight issues - it will require a massive lifestyle change and if you have been unable to make this change as it is, the likelihood is you will be unable to make the change post-surgery.

I feel exhausted from all the different things I've tried. The time it takes me to lose weight is excruciating and the mental effects more recently.
I'm aware surgery is a lifestyle change but have seen many who struggles to lose weight without it be successful after it. So I do disagree with your comment about me being unable to change post-surgery.

OP posts:
Original poster
MumnMore · 05/01/2023 01:16

Gingerkittykat · 05/01/2023 01:14

Can you go on the NHS waiting list? To qualify you need a BMI of 40+ or 35 plus health problems caused by your weight.

Waiting times vary a lot depending on area.

I wouldn't feel right having the surgery on the NHS. I've read waiting times can be 2+years too (which I understand as there are other priorities)

OP posts:
NewBootsAndRanty · 05/01/2023 01:21

Have you looked into credit unions?

2023goals · 05/01/2023 01:26

How much does the surgery cost?

ultimately you can crowd fund it, but you’re not guaranteed to raise the money. bare in mind the platform (eg go fund me) takes a % too. Frankly, from reading your OP as a potential go fund me page, you haven’t convinced me to donate…

can you get a loan perhaps?

or see if your surgeon will allow you to pay on finance/in instalments?

I don’t see why you wouldn’t go through the NHS if you could. Why isn’t that “right”? If you don’t think the NHS should fund weight loss surgery than what’s the alternative, you putting more effort into diet/exercise?

999caffeineplease · 05/01/2023 01:38

You may be right OP, the only reason for my comment about it requiring a lifestyle change is due to the experiences of people I know. All 3 people I know who have had some form of weight loss surgery are now back to their original weights.

Another thing to consider is how you would pay back any loan you get. If you’re struggling to save now, how would you manage to make the repayments?

I think ultimately your best bet would be to spend some time addressing the issues which have caused you to become overweight - would therapy help?

VimFuego101 · 05/01/2023 01:44

If you can get it via the NHS, it's because they have done the maths and determined that it's cheaper to give you weight loss surgery than to deal with all the health problems you may get due to obesity down the road (joint problems, sleep apnoea, diabetes). So I wouldn't concern yourself with the cost to the NHS - you are at risk of costing them more by remaining at your current weight.

mumofone2019 · 05/01/2023 02:37

This reply has been withdrawn

This post has been withdrawn at the poster's request due to privacy concerns.

Original poster
MumnMore · 05/01/2023 07:35

This reply has been deleted

This post has been withdrawn at the poster's request due to privacy concerns.

This is really helpful. I hadn't heard of these injections before. I'm going to contact my GP for some support today. Thank you

OP posts:
Original poster
MumnMore · 05/01/2023 07:37

NewBootsAndRanty · 05/01/2023 01:21

Have you looked into credit unions?

No, but I have just read up on my local one and it seems a great idea. Thank you

OP posts:
StuckInTheUpsideDown · 05/01/2023 07:40

I would look at Ozempic first. There are some threads on the weight loss board. You might be able to get it via the NHS but is only from specialist teams and looks like you would be expected to try other things first. Alternatively you can buy it by privately, it is around £200 a month and there are online providers such as My Juniper.

MNHQ
LivMumsnet · 05/01/2023 09:46

Hello everyone. We've had a number of reports from people concerned about this thread so, as we usually do in these circs, we're putting our heads round the door with some important reminders.

Right now we can't see any evidence to indicate that the OP isn't above board – if we did, we'd remove the thread straight away. But the truth is that, sadly, we at MNHQ can't know with 100% certainty that any poster is genuine, no matter who they are or how long they have been here. As frustrating as it is, we're not able to vouch for anyone here.

So we always ask users to remember that not everyone on the internet is who they say they are – and remind folk not to give more to another poster, either financially (in cash or gifts) or emotionally (in time or care and support) than they'd be prepared to lose if things went wrong.

Though, we strongly advise against parting with any cash or giving away your personal details, and if you receive a PM which makes you uneasy - report it to us and we’ll take a look.

We've compiled some useful links posted by Mumsnetters into a financial issues webguide, so that people experiencing difficulties can find all the relevant information in one place.

Sorry to hijack your thread briefly there, OP – we really hope you get it all sorted soon.

IDontCareMatthew · 05/01/2023 09:53

You won't get ozempic or saxenda from a gp

Your bmi isn't in the correct range and even then, it's very very difficult to get from them

Also, you do realise weight loss is 'excruciatingly' slow for everyone don't you?

As for crowdfunding....if you are popular, have a wide network of friends,family social media following and colleagues then yes, give it a go. Good luck

Unless the plan was to heavily hint on mumsnet for funds from here?

Original poster
MumnMore · 05/01/2023 10:01

IDontCareMatthew · 05/01/2023 09:53

You won't get ozempic or saxenda from a gp

Your bmi isn't in the correct range and even then, it's very very difficult to get from them

Also, you do realise weight loss is 'excruciatingly' slow for everyone don't you?

As for crowdfunding....if you are popular, have a wide network of friends,family social media following and colleagues then yes, give it a go. Good luck

Unless the plan was to heavily hint on mumsnet for funds from here?

I haven't heard of ozempic or saxenda before someone mentioned it so no idea whether the GP would prescribe it.

There's always someone who assumes incorrectly. I'm not "heavily hinting" at anyone on Mumsnet giving me the money.
The post has been reported so it seems you're not the only one who thinks that sadly.

OP posts:
Gazelda · 05/01/2023 10:06

What weight loss methods have you tried? How long have you been trying?

I really think it would be better for your family if you found a healthier way to lose weight.

Having said that, I empathise with your situation. I'm very overweight and find the amount I need to lose is an awfully demotivating target. The figure is daunting and I often feel as though the relentless effort isn't worth the pay if which would be years away.

But, 1lb at a time. I'll do it slowly and be proud of my achievements. You can do it too with the right approach and support.

Original poster
MumnMore · 05/01/2023 10:14

Gazelda · 05/01/2023 10:06

What weight loss methods have you tried? How long have you been trying?

I really think it would be better for your family if you found a healthier way to lose weight.

Having said that, I empathise with your situation. I'm very overweight and find the amount I need to lose is an awfully demotivating target. The figure is daunting and I often feel as though the relentless effort isn't worth the pay if which would be years away.

But, 1lb at a time. I'll do it slowly and be proud of my achievements. You can do it too with the right approach and support.

I have been trying to lose weight for around 3 years. I have had some success but it's becoming harder to shift.

I have done WW, Slimming World, Cambridge (1:1), healthy eating, low calorie, joining the gym.

Thank you for your message- it makes me feel like I need to keep trying and not to give up or try to find an easier way. Weight loss is hard whichever way you do it.

I hope you're successful on your journey.

OP posts:
barneshome · 05/01/2023 10:18

Eat vegetables and proteins
No bread spuds or anything sweet
Go for a run - gym
No need for surgery

Ariela · 05/01/2023 10:49

A friend of mine was in a not dissimilar position a few years ago, we were talking about it only yesterday having declined a piece of cake with our coffees! At the time she had absolutely no hope of affording weight loss surgery - it was a lot lot more expensive back then as relatively new, but she was desperate to loose the weight having noticed she couldn't get one of her favourite items of pre-Christmas work clothes on without having to use a safety pin
What she actually did was get sponsorship for weight loss. She roped in her best mate at work to do the weighing, and they never stated how much she weighed to start, just the target number of lb to loose. She said that first weigh-in was awful as she only lost 1lb, but as the second and third showed decent loss it encouraged her, and as the office were sponsoring her to loose it by paying per lb lost it was actually quite motivating, and some of the staff also joined her in no biscuits in the office. She cut out ALL snacks, soft fizzy drinks, lunch was salad etc, and took to leaving early to walk to work. For her birthday she asked for a pedometer for her birthday (this was before apps, fitbits etc etc) and she raised the number of steps per day significantly as once the first couple of stone was shed she got more mobile. She took up swimming and lost over the 60lb target, took less than the year she allowed, raising several hundred £ for the local hospice - we all chipped in £1 per lb, paying up a few £ a week was easy. She said having committed to raising the £££ she absolutely couldn't let the hospice or us sponsors down. She also says that loosing it naturally was she thinks far far better for her than invasive surgery, and while she'd be first to admit she's put a bit back on from time to time she finds it easier to keep off the snacks to get back to the new weight. I have to say she has slimmed a bit more now, but she was/is always chunky even as a child, so I can't imagine it was easy but she is very proud of doing it, and also of maintaining the weight loss for many years.

Could this sort of a no-cost plan be something for you to consider?