Women's refuge?

[Longstockin]

Hi. have any of you been in or know anyone that has been in a women's refuge? If so what does this look like please ie own little flat? Shared facilities? Support staff? TIA

It completely depends on where you’re sent.

Some places can provide only a room within a house, with shared facilities - though this may only be for a short period before being moved to a separate flat elsewhere. Alternatively you may be in a purpose built house with individual one or two bedroomed flats with additional communal meeting rooms downstairs. In some places accommodation - shared flats or houses - may be scattered around a town.

In all cases the staff should be able to assist with applying for benefits, (as residents pay rent for their accommodation), registering with a GP, placing any children in school, making a complaint to police regarding the abuser, pursuing a case through court if that happens. They will put you in touch with SS and the local council. Moving residents into permanent housing will be a priority.

As I understand it demand for places in refuges exceeds supply many times over, (and some have closed due to lack of funds) so anyone who needs a place would be very lucky to get one. Whatever the refuge is like, it’s only a stepping stone - take advantage of whatever help is offered so you can move on with as much optimism as possible.

The refuge i was in was a shared house own room.

Dependant on your Ds"s age you may not be allowed in shared accommodation.

I absolutely don’t think you’re being fussy! And you shouldn’t have to be particularly grateful, either - refuges should be able to accommodate everyone who needs the service.

Your SW is right - there is likely be much more face to face help from experienced staff available in a refuge. You would probably find it a relief after the purgatory of a B&B.

And moving further away should make safety less of a concern. That would reduce your level of stress - which may have a positive impact on your son.

I can understand why you’d hesitate if you have family or friends close by - but honestly, a fresh start somewhere new might work out. It’s hard to tell - do you know whether it’s likely to be a thriving town / city with plenty of jobs, decent schools, entertainment - or an out of the way place with few prospects? That’s what should swing it for you …