The mummy of one of DS's class mates died last week, just heard...

[Kbear]

I didn't know her personally as she doesn't do the school run and has been ill for a couple of years but I'm so sad to hear it.

I just told DS, in the gentlest way I could that this little girl's mummy died and she might not be at school for a while and to be extra sensitive and kind to her when she comes back.

His little face! So sad. (he's 6 BTW).

I am now wondering what we can do re flowers, a card, donation to charity of her choice, something for the children. Anyone got any ideas of what would be best and how best to approach this. This is really for the mums that know her better to decided but everyone has an input so I knew where to come for advice.

How sad

Offers of practical help may be well received- taking the children to/from school etc for example.

make a casserole / any kind of food that can be reheated easily or frozen

send it with instructions on how to reheat ... send it with a mum who knew her better

include a card .. express your sentiments, tell them how you heard, include any memories you have of her, offer help if you wish (but make this something definite like help with shopping / further cooking / help taking children to school / playdates if kids know each other) .. remember that sympathy cards may not be read immediately but may be read and re-read at later dates

WinstonsWish has some good information regarding helping bereaved children .. but this really depends on how close your DS is to this child

sometimes you just have to be available to be there and listen and be a part of the community who feels the loss too

oh if sending food send it in a container you do not expect returned

The food suggestions are a bit awkward when you don't know the family at all though Twig, although many thanks for them anyway, you ideas might help someone else too. I think I will send a card through other parent and offer my help where I can. I know the family are away for the time being in another part of the country.

I agree with the just being part of the community who feels the loss. It's so true. It puts so much into perspective and makes you appreciate your family.

if you want, you can just check with someone who knows them whether they eat meat or not .. if they do then sausage casserole is a good mainstay, it they don't then a vegetable hotpot .. just something warming and easy

(I have had experience of something very similar .. and that's what I did anyway .. we are now extremely close friends as our younger children joined nursery at same time)

So sorry Kbear. I think if you are unsure a card just shows you are thinking about them and have taken time to show them that you are.

Twig, if you are still around could you look here

thanks Dances